Problems staying excited....NEED HELP!!

[Spartacus2004]

Hey this thread isn't for so much for me as it is my friend. He was looking for advice and i had no way to give it to him and i suggested this site but idt he's going to check it out so i figure i could pass on a little advice from y'all (I may say its from me thinking about it so sorry if i don't give credit but i don't want him to know i posted this)......anyway....he and his gf have been going out for about a month and they've kinda gotten into the sex game a bit more now but he's been having a slight problem....he has not much problem getting excited before sex....but when he goes to put on a condom...all the fumbling with the wrapper and having to put it on properly and being careful with it and all...he sorta loses his excited-ness if ya catch my drift. Anyway, he's been kinda taking it a bit hard i guess cause i mean he's 18...young...healthy...but he loses his excited-ness over a condom....is this normal like have many girls had their bf have this problem or does it sound like it may be a medical situation....kinda lost so if i could get some comments from guys or girls that have or know someone with this sorta problem maybe i could talk him outta his slump. thanks

[Bethany]

quote: but when he goes to put on a condom...all the fumbling with the wrapper and having to put it on properly and being careful with it and all...he sorta loses his excited-ness

 

What man doesn't? A simple solution is to get her to keep him 'up' is to masturbate him while he fumbles around, or if she's into it then get her to do it, maybe get a flavoured one and use her mouth.

[ratherbesailing]

Spartacus -

 

I don't think this is a medical situation and it is a fairly common problem. This is the type of problem that, when it happens once, every time after that his mind is going to be in a panic. We guys put so much pressure on ourselves that you wouldn't believe what goes through our minds.

 

First off alcohol and pot would make the problem worse so only sober sex for now.

 

I'd have him buy a couple of dozen cheap condoms or a hundred and practice putting them on by himself alone. I'm sure he'll find he can keep things hard when there isn't pressure to perform. Let him get really comfortable with putting it on by himself and he won't be as worried when it comes to the bedroom. Rolling them on will become less awkward. He may want to try different types, maybe one with lubrication and one without.

 

When he is with her he should open the wrapper and put the condom on top of the wrapper next to the bed. That takes one big step out of the equation when they are in the swing. I know it sounds a little less than spontanious but who cares?

 

I'd advise against having her put the condom on him, instead I'd say let her finger herself or play with her breasts or both while he's putting it on. That aught to drive him crazy and he won't feel like she's watching and waiting to see if he's going to have a problem. He can join in as soon as he's ready.

 

Then keep practicing and soon enough he'll forget he ever had a problem.

[Shadows Light]

Well.. I like Bethany's idea and that works... or do what I do.. apply the condom with your mouth.. its sure to keep him fired up!!!

[PocoDiablo]

Well.. I like Bethany's idea and that works... or do what I do.. apply the condom with your mouth.. its sure to keep him fired up!!!

Hey, that was going to be my suggestion!

 

It works great for me... just be sure to get the FLAVORED condoms! lol

 

Yeah, not a medical issue. Happens to the best of us. The only time it happened with me was when I was with the most amazing woman I had ever met. It must have been performance anxiety!

[Relationship Coach]

Spart,

Reading over the chronology of all of your former posts, I understand where you are coming from. Medically there is nothing wrong with YOUr friends Johnson, it's all mental. A cross between performance anxiety and the reduced sensitivity that the condom creates. Tell YOUr friend to teach his girlfriend how to put it on correctly. A new set of hands may work better. You've come a long ways from sloppy french kissing at the bowling alley. Good Luck.

[SuperDuper]

Haha people and their sense of humour. ^

[Shadows Light]

ohhhh the condom thing.. I fogot to add.. you don't want to do this with a condom ladened with NONOXYL 9... it numbs your mouth. YES.. I've done this.... don't do this to yourself!!!! No flavor.. or flavor much better.. N9.. not only kills sperm and eewwwy goooy stuff... it kills taste buds...

 

Try to be SEXY with a mouth that feels like NOVACAINE was just sprayed in it... OMG...

[Venturer]

Oh yeah, this happened to me twice, both with different women. One of them was understanding, and and the other didn't take it very well. It's normal for this to happen... and women would do themselves a favor if they can be more understanding..

 

That way, it takes the pressure off the guys.

[dr_skier]

get the girl to put the condom on with her mouth, it's fantastic.