I am so ANGRY, is this natural?

[redandblack]

had to delete, sorry

[Hawk]

Of course it's natural - all part of the process of helping you move through it all. Be prepared for a whole raft of emotions over the coming weeks - all of which will be appropriate for you. In time it settles down, but just be prepared for what will come your way.

[Reilly2856]

Don't worry, your reaction is completely natural. However, also understand that your ex's friend will defend her....if nothing more than out of loyalty. Expect that. Just as your friends will defend you. Still, I'm glad you put your ex's friend in her place....in time, this anger will pass.

[antigravity]

Surprisingly, anger is better than sadness or apathy.

 

Feel all the emotions that come with the break up. You'll appreciate it in the long run.

[Zerohero]

Your gonna be feeling this more, and more again as time goes on.

[moondog627]

Totally natural. Just don't act on any of your impulses. You'll probably feel so much better once the anger is out of your system. I had it for a good month to 2 months. I still miss my ex and it hurts from time to time, but I feel much more at peace now having let the whole gamut of emotions flow thru me. You'll get there.

[Bigbilly]

Yeah, the anger is natural, and helpfull. But don't act on the impulses it may plant in your mind. It's better to find some way to cool off and rethink whatever it is you may feel inclined to do in some moment of passion.

 

I'd advice you to stop having anything to do with mutual friends you may have with your ex. I'd bet my left nut that she went running straight to your ex with the story of your conversation, and the two of them had a good talk and decided, "I'm better off." Your anger isn't going to change your mind, but it will help you heal as long as you don't make a scene where info of it is going to get back to her. Use it to steel yourself, heal, and get over here and start meeting other girls.

 

And virginity is overrated. At least, I think so. I'd rather have a girl who's a bit experienced (not a slut, though), and know's what the Hell she's doing in bed.

[darkblue]

Denial (this isn't happening to me!)

Anger (why is this happening to me?)

Bargaining (I promise I'll be a better person if...)

Depression (I don't care anymore)

Acceptance (I'm ready for whatever comes)

The 5 stages.

 

Some people follow them - some don't.

I don't like generalizing people as everyone is different.

But yes, anger is a common emotion after a breakup.

[melrich]

Yes and the 5 stages do not always occur in sequence and going "through" one stage does not mean you won't revisit it. It can be a topsy turvy ride.

 

But as another poster said, don't act on your anger. It will pass and it is probably the time when you are thinking least clearly.

[theHeat]

Dude! Way to tell off your ex's lousy friend! It seems all girls have that one friend that always agrees with whatever they do. It's so lame.

 

I think feeling angry is tons better than feeling down about anything. When you depressed, you don't want to do anything but lay around be a waste of life. Plus, being angry let's you know that you accpet that she had done you wrong to you and not the other way around. Channel your anger into something constructive. Join a sport, lift weights, start running.

[sorryJason]

Keep the anger, it will help you through those sad, "oh god I want her back so bad" times, it will keep you from calling, btw, don't call her, it will only make things worse, I know from experience! But don't use your anger against her, in a bad way, like doing something to her, in the end you will be the bad one and she will feel even more justified for breaking up with you. Prove to yourself that you are better than her, that you deserve someone better than her, and you do. Be the bigger person, it will pay off in the end I promise.

 

I know how you feel about the virginity thing, it hurts, especially when it is taken like something cheap, some of us, especially those who have waited for a long time, feel cheated when it is take from someone that doesn't care about it, or us.

 

Go out with your friends, not hers, maybe they will not defend her, maybe they will see your side, pump yourself up, you need it, tell yourself that you are better than her. Remember she broke up with you, not the other way around, if you are better person than her, she will have to carry the weight of losing someone as good as you for the rest of her life! And you can realize that she made the mistake, not you. She will try to blame you for everthing she can because it makes it easier for her to be away from you and stay away, she doesn't want to think of the good times you had because then she might just want you back.

 

Stay strong, find someone better, look for someone with morals and someone who is deep, there are good people out there you just have to search for them, don't think they will just fall into your lap.

 

Take care, friend!

[FCTex]

Your feelings are extremely normal.

 

My suggestion would be to cut all contact not only with your ex, like you have, but also with her friends. Even mutual friends that come from "her side of the field".

 

It makes it alot easier to not talk to family/friends of the ex for a while.

 

Your going through the swing of emotions. Your not done dealing with this, your still obviously hurt by it. It's natural, and your naturally going to get defensive.

 

My only suggestion would be to not hold any anger in. Let it all out. Be mad, let it be known. Express all your feelings, cry, hit something, run away for an evening and be alone. Go out with friends, family. Go on a date. Do something and vent, get away, and let it all get out, be real about it.

 

It's okay to have feelings towards it. Don't hold it back, because holding in your anger, or continueing to foster ill feelings for her, or her friends, would simply not allow you to heal and move on.