This is absolutely RIDICULOUS. But I'm in love.

[koremi]

I'm one of those teenage poster children for "love sucks". My whole life, I've watched everything I knew fall apart because of it, and now I'm falling head over heels and I don't want to get hurt. It's the one thing about my life I can't control....

 

Michael and I have been best friends for three years, since 8th grade. We're sophomores now. I've watched him grow into himself and vice versa, except I've done a little more fooling around than he has. He's never even kissed anyone, let alone been in a relationship. Honestly, I've never been in a real relationship, the only times I allowed myself to do anything was when I was desperate, realized I wasn't getting what I wanted, and ended things after a week. I've never had anything longer than a week.

 

I've spilled all of my problems out onto him, and he's seen me go through everything, my parents' divorce, being hospitalized as a suicide case, me questioning my sexuality, everything personal that I wouldn't want a potential date to know. But I guess that's better that he knows me, but is it too intimidating?

 

I'm naturally a very outgoing person, and it tends to intimidate people. Especially guys like Michael with zero experience. I know that he's kind of afraid of me. I don't want to scare him off.

 

Recently, we've been spending a lot of time one-on-one, walking around at night, getting to know each other again, because we've been drifting. I don't know if he feels the same way about me than I do about him, but I want to do something about it. I will risk losing our friendship, there's no doubt about that, because it is dwindling, and frankly, I couldn't be friends with someone I'm falling in love with knowing that nothing would ever happen. (See how this could be potentially intimidating....?)

 

I just want some advice for a smooth way to get things going a little. This Friday I'm taking him out to the woods by this creek(we live in a city and I found this pretty place, and I'm an artist, and I was going to sketch a little and he's coming along) and having some kind of picnic-like thing. It can't be like normal teen bull, the "going out" status symbol, even we've discussed that to each other. It has to be real, and I just want to know how to handle someone like him and help get things going a little.

 

(Like, he's been getting beaten down in soccer and I'm good at back rubs, and all this other stuff that I don't know how to initiate.)

 

Thanks

[Caldus]

Michael: Yeah, ouch, soccer has been kicking my *** lately.

You: How so?

Michael: Back hurts...

You: Here...

 

And go from there.

[Nkaleidoscopic]

Pursue it like a normal relationship. Get close, admit that you like him, and see how it goes. If he's a good friend it shouldnt mess up anything even if he doesn't like you.

 

I don't think your in love.

 

Just my opinion.

[stratguy620]

The same thing happened with my best friend and I. I was so scared that I would end up ruining the friendship, but I has head over heels for this girl. After a while, I took a look at my choices. I realized that if she really was my best friend, then there was no way I could ruin our bond, and if I didn't tell he how I felt, I would probably spend my whole life wondering what if. Well, long story short, I told her how I felt, she felt the same way, and I spent 2 incredible years with her. Anyways with your situation, you said that he too doesn't want that typical 13 year old "going out" junk, so I'm sure you two have talked about a relationship before. Like I said, just sit down with him sometime (the picnic would be a good place), and be completely open with him. Good luck, and I hope things work out for the best for you...