where do I go from here?

[flightymighty]

It's been ten days since he just stopped contact after we decided to work things out.

 

I have been implementing NC and some days are better than others - today feels a little weird as mornings are always the hardest for me.

 

I sent an e-mail apologizing for a lot of things and expressing my love - do I send another one to get the closure I so desperately need? As I said, the guy left me hanging like a fool and i have no idea what to do.

 

Will NC make him miss me or just drive us further apart. Is he wondering why I haven't called? this is rare for me.

[acuraman]

Please stop blaming yourself for what happened, its not your fault and you shouldn't be aplogizing to him either. By apologizing, you make yourself look clingy and needy.

 

I dont think you should send him an email for closure because hes probably not going to respond to it. From what I have learned through this forum, the more you try to contact him, the more distant they will become. You just have to give him time and let him figure things out without you interrupting his thinking process. If he calls you in the future, it will be up to you whether you answer or not depending on how much healing and growing you have achieved throughout this process.

 

I know its hard not to have closure, I was just in that same situation. It took my ex about 7 weeks to call me back, and I finally got closure by asking her what went wrong in our relationship and asked many "why" questions too. Wait till he calls you and then you could ask him "why" questions to get your closure. Good luck and keep us posted.

[flightymighty]

I need to call him....just to find out. Again, how is one supposed to get closure. Why is this so hard when it was me who initiated him moving out?

[Jut]

I agree. If you call him to get closure, things he is going to say are going to haunt you further. You will spend nextmonth analyzing what he said or what he meant and fall to the same position you are in right now.

I heard such amusing things for my closure , but when iheard them initially i spent day and night analyzing them.

I would say dont pick up the phone if he calls and if you do decide after he calls 2-3 times to pick up , keep the conversation short, decent and away from analyzing what went wrong. It will only hurt you to bring up those things and the guy cud start manipulating too based on your response.

[flightymighty]

yeah but i want him back. How am I supposed to do that with NC?