Pregnant again 2 weeks after termination

[bravegirl04]

Hello all....I have some things going on so i was wondering if i could get some advice!

 

In september, i was forced to terminate my pregnancy because i had pre-cancerous cells in my uterus...thank God everything is alright with that...but the fact remained that i did not have my child anymore....for anyone who has had an abortion it was the worst experience of my life....i cried everyday and i prayed to God to please give me another chance to have a child...

God is so good! About 2 weeks i found out i was pregnant again....i kno im young and not married but im ready...theres just one problem....

I have only known the father for about 2 months...we really dont get along too well, we just have casual sex. I told him i was pregnant and he told me to kill it fast..i told him about the situation i just went thru and he didnt seem interested...He said he cant take care of it...so i told him i dont play games, if he wants to be ugly about this situation then i will get ugly too...then he straightened up but i still dont think he is going to cooperate...

What should i do? I Dont want to seem selfish because i do care about his future, but at the same time i want this so bad.....

[RayKay]

Well, if you want to keep the child and are prepared to do so then go ahead...he is responsible too for the child and hopefully will have a part in the childs life. Were you on birth control? If not....hmm, and he knew that, well he should of known risk. And if you are, well there is still a risk.

 

I am not so sure this child was an "accident" though, and it does not sound like you discussed this with him, or thought it through very thoroughly that you are not attached in some way to this man for the rest of this childs life, and this is the father you chose for that child...I hope he owns up but...ugh.

 

However, seeing that you are very young, you are going to have a rough road ahead. Not impossible, but it definitely won't be easy. You need to look at how you are going to be able to afford and take care of this child both physically and emotionally.

 

I will say though you need to seek medical care ASAP. It is dangerous to be pregnant so soon after an abortion due to scarring, and changes to your cervix that need to heal/close up, and in fact you are not even supposed to have sex for a couple weeks after...so if you are already knowing you are pregnant, you definitely did not wait very long.

[emma34]

It appears that this child was not a mistake and you intended on having this baby no matter WHAT the father says. He cannot tell you to abort the baby and expect you to follow since you are happy about having this baby, but the fact is, I don't think you can expect a real father out of this man. Having a child is a wonderful thing, and I personally can't wait to have one either...but I'd wait forever for my child to have a good family. You are pregnant, thereforeeee the things that have happened cannot be undone - but please think about the life your baby will have. Try to form a real relationship with this man, but if you cannot and he refuses to be a father...then you are forced to move on for your childs sake. As a mother it is your right and your priveledge to protect your child above all else. I cannot tell you what to do - but I truly hope you do not abort and that this man takes responsibility for his own.

[Vert]

I agree... Why were you not on BC? Were you trying to get pregnant and not tell your partner at the time? I guess he didn't know or else he really didn't care either way. A bit irresponsible on both of your parts, but to each their own...

 

With that said, I'm assuming you probably have HPV if you had pre-cancerous cells on your uterus (at a young age, apparently), and you also have a new partner and new pregnany less than 3 months later? Did your gyno tell you to lay off pregnancy seeing as your current condition could cause health issues for you or the baby? I guess I'm just curious as to why you want a child so badly that you'll have unprotected sex with new partners right after an abortion and negative papsmear? Anyway, if this man is not going to own up to his accountability here then you need to get help from Planned Parenthood for raising this child properly in a single mother home.

[PavPPZ1]

Hey,

 

you and the father really need to have a heart to heart, this is something that the both of you need to decide.

 

It sounds that you pregnancy is in its infancy, so I suggest that you still give it some very hard thought, because if both of you dont agree on this, your child will grow up without a father. Thats why you should always practice safe sex, but in this case its past that point. Try to talk to this guy, and get his perspective on what he will do if you have this kid.

[TheSmilingTurnip]

If you want to have this child, then you should. Under no circumstances should you have an abortion just because someone thinks you should.

 

You have your decisions to make. He has his. If he chooses not to be there for this child, then that's not something you can control. You can control and be responsible for your actions.

 

Don't back down and don't get ugly.

 

I'm not sure what you mean by 'cooperate'?

[Hope75]

There is also the chance that you are not pregnant. The Hcg hormone remains in the body for 4-8 weeks after an abortion. You are saying that you just had an abortion 2 weeks ago? Your body has probably just recently emptied the uteral lining, and may not have even ovulated since your abortion.

 

I'm wondering why you think you are pregnant so quickly after the abortion, did you take a test? They can come up false positive after an abortion for up to 2 months.

[Meow18]

Like Hope, I'm also curious about this. Are you sure you are pregnant?

 

The father shouldn't be getting so upset at you about it. It's common sense that having sex has consequences, although some people just never think it could happen to them. He helped in making this child. So to blame you and be mad at you for wanting to make your own decision about your own body is just not right.

 

You need to talk to him about this. What you do with your body is your choice. If you don't want to have an abortion, then don't. If he doesn't want to be in the child's life, then that's his choice. That's when you need to decide what to do. Have him pay child support? Or just forget about him and raise your baby on your own? Also, it seem like you want to keep this child, but if you don't think you can give it the life it deserves, there is always adoption.

 

If the father wants to be in the child's life, try to get along with him. You don't have to love him, just don't hate him for the sake of the baby. It will really effect a child if his mother and father can't stand each other.

[amylyn930]

I think you should have the baby... abortion is so cruel and if you got preg. again then it's obviously a gift from God.. yes it may be hard but if you feel that it's worth it then fight for him/her with all you have. Plus once you have him/her you wont be able to picture your life without them. And maybe the father just needs some time to come to realize whats going on. But pllllease dont kill it.. especially when its something you want soo bad... you may never have the oppertunity again...