love!

[Rastacreed]

Hello everyone,

Ok, i have a little bit of a problem. I am with this guy and we have been together for about 8 months now. We've never had a real fight, we get along, we have a lot in common. We're not just lovers but we're really good friends. The only problem is that i am in love with him. And when it comes to him being in love with me he says he thinks he is but he doesnt know if it is or not. so i dont know what im suppose to do. im sorry, but after 8 months, you should know how you feel about another person. do you think hes scared or hes really not in love with me. what can i do to make him tell me the truth. he tells me he'll do anything in the world for me and that he doesnt know what he'd do if i wasnt there but he wont say hes in love he says he doesnt know. help! i dont know what to do.

[in_the_mirror]

i am in a similar situation only my boyfriend really loves me. i am kinda scared cuz i don't wanna hurt him but i am not sure if i will always be able to return the same feelings. your guy jus might not be ready for a serious relationship he might think that saying he loves you might tie him down and he might have to give up some of the partying or whatever he does with his buddies and you. but don't keep questioning him about it cuz prolly all it is doing is pushing him away and he may not like being pushed away cuz he has feelings for you he jus isn't sure how to handle them all yet. i find it all jus overwhelming sometimes and it kinda scares me

[eblue]

Yah. This sounds like something my boyfriend said when I first told him I loved him. Actually the first several times I told him I loved him he said the same things. SOunds like the same kind of relationship I have too. Cept I have been dating him a few months longer. We are really good friends too. SO here is the thing and what I did. When I told him I loved him one of the times he said he didn't know, I said that its okay if he isn't. That it means more when he knows for sure and means it. I said that everyone has different meanings on what love is to them and it takes us a while to figure out what it means to us. I then told him what love meant to me. To me it means someone that makes you happy. Someone you can't wait to be around because being around them can completely brighten up your day. That you feel complete around them. That you can be yourself. Someone you care about alot and is a big part of your life. He then awwed like a girl and said well he thinks he loves me but isn't sure yet. Then after a few weeks he came up to me kissed me on the lips and said he loved me and he was positive of it.

 

Its hard for boys to do this love thing. To admit they are in love is like vulnerability. But don't push him. As much as I know you want him to just say it, doing that is just going to make it harder for him to mean it when he says it. Let him know its okay thathe doesn't say it, but when he is sure to let you know. Maybe go about it like I did. Tell him that everyone has different meanings and that its okay he doesn't know his yet. Maybe tell him what you think love means to give him an idea of what it could mean to him. As much as its hard to do...try to give him time and understanding...In the end..when he says it, you will know he means it and it will mean so much more than you not knowing if he is just saying it to shut you up..Good luck hun!