Being more independent? (long)

[easyguy]

For most of my life, I have been dependent on others, especially my parents. I am 18, and have never had a job in my life, but I play music by means of making money, which can be intermittent. When I do make money, I make good money. I'm an entering college freshman this fall, and have a plan for the next few years of my life. The college I am attending this fall is inexpensive, but one that I am planning on transfering to in a couple of years is way more expensive, and on the other side of the country.

 

My parents usually pay for most of the things I get (which I am slowly starting to not like), but I would feel very bad knowing that they paid for my full tuition to one of the most expensive colleges in the U.S., even if I got some financial aid to bump down the costs some.

 

I feel that me being dependent and almost spoiled (though I don't get ANYthing I want) is going to come back and bite be sooner or later, especially when I move 3000 miles away and try to live on my own. To be honest, even though it's a couple years away, I'm scared already. I've also never been away from my parents for more than a week before.

 

Next summer there is a 5 week program for my college interest in a couple years that I have been considering applying to. I think it would be a good thing for me to do. For one, it forces me to get used to being away from home for an extended period of time, and it gives me a huge insight on what the school itself is going to be like.

 

During my last couple of high school years, I always noticed the very independent students. This one girl in one of my history classes was already living on her own, and paying her own rent, and she was not even in college yet. Perhaps it's a family thing, who knows.

 

For you independent young adults, what did you do to work on being more independent? Any advice at all would be appreciated.

 

I am starting to feel guilty when my parents by me stuff (mostly CDs, which are important to my growth as a musician, but that's another story). Last winter I played some music with a local musician at this outdoor market for tips, and we split the money at the end. Our playing got cut short, so we stopped with not much money. This was just before Christmas, and I felt like buying something for someone else for once. We split the money, and we both ended up with $15. So afterwards I went into the mall and looked at a few stores for Christmas gifts. I wanted to by my mother something. I did buy her something, but I had to look around for a while before I found something I thought she'd like that I could buy with the money I had.

 

Thanks!

[DragonGirl724]

i suggest becoming more self sufficient. get a job, even a part time BS job for spending money. and i think going away for that summer thing is a good idea...BUT i suggest YOU save up the money YOURSELF & go. if you don't accumulate the funds before next summer, then don't go. the only way to grow up, is to learn things on your own, learn to handle time & money management & lead your own life.

 

-DG724

[easyguy]

Thanks, dragongirl.

 

I just found out that the program is around $5400 (w/ housing), and about $5200 without housing, but I'm determined. Either way, I do think it'd be a good thing for me to do. They also have scholarhips available, but they yield about $800 or so (every little bit helps, though!!).

 

Just have to save up a ton a money for it.

 

Oh, and my birthday is coming up in about 3 weeks, and I usually get lots of money. Better to start sooner than later.

[Celadon]

I think it's great that you're starting to take responsibility for your finances. Once you become fully independent, or even as you're getting there, you'll have a great sense of self-sufficiency.

 

It will take time, though. Like, it may take a few years to get there, which would be a good transition period.

 

The key to success will be to plan, plan, plan.

 

Summer session at the college you're interested in? Great idea. I'd start by figuring out how much you'll need to work per week to get to your goal.

 

To earn $5,400 in nine months, you'll need to bring home $600 a month (after taxes!!). That's $150 a week, or more like $225 a week, because you'll pay 1/3 of your salary to taxes.

 

I don't know how much music pays, but a good entry-level retail job could get you $10/hour. So that's ... 22.5 hours a week of retail work. What do you think of that?

 

If it seems like too much time spent working, consider striking a deal with your folks: If you can pay for HALF of next summer's session, would they pay the other half? I think that would be reasonable.

 

Hope some of this helps!

[DragonGirl724]

im sure his parents will help out, this IS a lot of dough. try to save up most of the money. remember tho, being an adult isnt just about paying your bills, it also should reflect how you carry yourself.

 

-DG724

[easyguy]

k8tie,

 

On a good day, playing music for tips (busking) at an outdoor market can get me around $50-60 for about 2 hours worth of playing. Problem is, I can't do it everyday (usually once a week).

 

My parents are starting up this restaurant thing, so I'll definitely work part time there (it opens in a couple of months), and see if I can help in the construction (actually, renovation) of this place for pay, so I can at least get started early.

 

There are a handful of scholarships available for the summer program. Unlike the last program I went out for (not the 5 week), I won't forget to apply for scholarships. The top amount is $850, so it'll at least knock it under $5000 if I can get one.

 

DragonGirl,

 

I've never saved up for something this expensive before, so I am sure I can pay for half of it now (when it comes time to apply), and through the restaurant part-time job/busking, I can pay the other half through time. It'd be sort of a loan, I guess.

 

Thanks for the help, ladies.

[DragonGirl724]

no prob. hope it all works out for ya.

 

-DG724