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[AlwaysNeedHelp]

hi

 

i have a problem.. i can say that i have alooot of friends.. i know alot of people.. but i dont have any close friends.. maybe 3 or 4 at most through all my life.. i mean i dont have close friends that i can go out with.. actually there are but few...

 

maybe bec i dont trust people easily and i dont get along with them easily.. also iam shy.. also all what i do is play sports.. but most people just go out go to a movie or have fun by any ways... i dont like these kind of gatherings alot.. i dont know is it something wrong with me..

 

iam not so outgoing also.. how can i change this ? sometimes i feel that iam soo lonely.. i dont find anyone to talk to or to got out with.. this sometimes causes me terrible feelings.. in the past i used to play sports with friends aloot everyday, i had more close friends.. but now i dont know what happened.. i feel like they grown up and iam still in my childish dreams. can anyone help me !!

[WildChild]

Talking with people can be very nerve racking sometimes, especially when you don't know them. I consider myself very outgoing, but there was a time when I couldn't even order a pizza over the phone because I would get so nervous they would actually ask me if the call was a prank LOL

 

The thing that worked for me is I took speech classes when I was in hs and also was on a competition speech team as well. I was in my late 20s when I decided to go back to college and I took speech there as well. It grows confidence in speaking with people and it allows you to listen to others and learn their approaches. One of the most self-fulfilling classes I took in college was Human Relations. In that class I learned so much about myself, how to interact with people, personal spaces etc....I really would recommend to anyone to pick up a book (new or used) at a local college or Tech college. You learn SO much about people relations...things that I learned on what to do and not to do and have carried it with me for over 4 years. Another approach is to join a group where they meet once a week or month and practice their communication skills. I went to one of these classes for a college course and it was gr8. Not only do you work on communicating better with people, you learn to be able to be in a room full of people you don't know but you are all there for the same reason...better communication and you learn self confidence

 

Another thought, you enjoy sports so much have you joined local sport teams? Through community ed or local businesses? You then have put yourself in a position where you are with people who enjoy sports and you have opened yourself up to meeting more people who share your interests.

 

You say you have maybe 3-4 close friends. Here's a thought to ponder that my dad has always told me: 'You will always know who are your true friends in time of trouble.' You probably have way more close friends than you are giving yourself credit for

[Jonathon]

I feel the same way as you. I pretty much walk by myself at school except for a few occasions, and I have tons of friends, but not any close ones. I probably say hey and what's up to over 40 people for a good 2 or 3 minutes, but not talk to them until the next day.

 

I got a few close friends but not much, but that's not to say I don't have friends.

[AlwaysNeedHelp]

yeah exactly i know alot of people. really aloot but no body to talk too...

 

i dont know but when i look back at myself i see myself very innocent and kind.. i was always the guy with the good manners.. iam still know with my good manners.. but most of people now dont really have good manners... well iam saying the truth... iam not complimenting myself..

 

i always used to advice poeple by good things.. for example something i realized, my friends on msn always block eachother alot... i have no reason why.. like there is a friend i talk to in college.. and he just says how much he missed me and stuff.. but then i found out that he blocked me... today i just told him hi how r u.. and he said gtg and blocked me i dont believe it.. i didnt say anything.. i never blocked anyone.. i dont know why people block eachother without reason..