Am i the weird one?

[naughtycowgirl]

Hey guys,

 

Ok here is my story......

 

I am 14 years old and i look atleast 17-20 years old. And my maturity level is about the age of an adult. My mom told me that i matured so quickly because i was the only child from 3 years and up. My brother died when i was three so thereforeeee i have been the only child for 11 years. SO the problem is i like guys and have dated guys 16 and up. the last time i had a boyfriend my age was when i was in 5th grade. I am not in no hurry to grow up or anything. I just can't stand guys my age, they are so immature and ignorant. So i wanted to know if this was abnormal or normal for an only child that has been raised around adults most of there life?

[frustratedWithLife]

First of all, you're not the weird one. It is normal for girls in your age group to develop and mature quicker than boys. thereforeeee you look to older boys for a little more maturity.

 

As far as this being a result of being an only child, not the case. It is more likely that being around adults most of your life has an effect. I've been in the same situation for all of my life up till just less than a year ago when I entered into a relationship with someone that wasn't more than a year older than me. I do have a brother, yet I've been (and prefer to be) around adults most of my life.

 

My advice (which my parents gave me and I ignored) enjoy your youth, be immature! Once you grow up it's much harder to go back.

[jna35]

It seems as though you are having a rough time dealing with this as many of your posts relate to this very topic.

 

I was also an only child, at least for the most part. There is a huge age gap between me and my siblings, the closest being over 9 years. By the time I was 9 I became the only child because we moved and my sister stayed behind. Also, both brothers had been in the Navy for several years already.

 

Most kids think they are more mature than they really are. I think we all experience that, but there is ALWAYS more to learn. Age is not a sign of maturity. I know plenty of people who are my age and even older that have the maturity level of a 2 year old, lol! Sad, but true!

 

So, is it normal that one should be more mature growing up around adults? I would say in part yes. I mean, provided they are mature adults and you are able to learn from them. Another important ingredient in that is how you were raised. Being around adults doesn't automatically make one mature.

 

I also think it's normal to like guys a bit older than yourself. For the most part, guys do mature more slowly than girls. However, that being said, there are ALWAYS exceptions. Don't rule out a guy based solely on their age. Look for a quality person who treats you with decency and respect.

[Dannysgirl]

Hi,

 

No I don't think you're weird. A lot of girls go through phases of wanting to date older guys because they seem 'mature and sophisticated' but believe me that is not always the case. Older men can be just as immature and ignorant as their younger counterparts and some of them, however old they get just never grow up period!

 

If you are going to date older guys please be safe, make sure you mom knows where you are and set a time that you will be home. Also be careful about being alone with anybody you date until you know as you don't want to be pressured into doing anything you're not ready for, that is one of the problems with seeming older than you are as some guys might think you are more experienced sexually and might try to take things further.

 

Not all younger guys are that bad you know, a lot of their immaturity and ignorance is just a put on show for the rest of the guys to try and prove how cool they are. If there are any guys you know around your age who seem okay why not try to get to know them? You might be pleasantly surprised.

 

I must say I don't envy you! I always hated the disrespectful way that boys used to talk about girls in my class having made out with them. If they didn't make out they were 'tight' and if they DID they were 'easy'

not to mention all the 'breast ratings' that went on.

 

I never did understand and to this day don't get why men have to behave that way and be so indiscreet about their encounters or be downright nasty if they don't get an encounter in the first place! (would any guys on here care to shed some light?)

 

As a result of what went on in and out if the classroom I decided to wait a little longer than was standard to lose my virginity (with an actual grown up mature guy at the age of 21) as I did not want it to be with one of the spotty greasy smug little gits in my class so he could go and tell all and sundry about it! That happened to a lot of my friends so be very careful and get to know somebody very well before you take anything further with a guy and please don't be in a rush to grow up.

 

You can't get your childhood back one its gone and in years to come you might find yourself wishing you'd behaved a little more childishly because you won't be able to do that when you're in your twenties! Have fun!

[metallicachica247]

i like older guys too, im 14 and i look at 17 year olds its only 3 years difference, when i was 13 i dated a 16 year old... it lasted for about 6 months. Youre right they are more mature and sweeter, but the thing i found was they move too fast for me sometimes. I mean im all for kissing and all but im not having sex in my near future. If you are ok with moving faster, then your not weird at all. Whats wrong with a guy thats more mature than a 14 year old? Plus they can drive...

[Tigris]

There's nothing wrong with going out with an older guy, but please be careful.

 

Take care of yourself.