At a loss

[singer1030]

I need some advice how to handle this situation with my boyfriend. Basically he thinks that I lie to him often about things that I do when we are not together. Let me just explain first that I love being with him and I am past the whole going out every night bar scene so, I rarely go out with my friends when I am not with him. It hurts so bad that he has the nerve to think that I lie to him and don't do and say what I tell him. Basically I am not the type to lie or leave out some details especially with the one I love and care so much about. We had a fight today about that because I told him I hate going out with my friends and he hears me on the phone making tenative plans with a friend to maybe go out. I wasn't going to be with him because he was with his children. Anyway, we ended things and I told him that if he thinks that I lie to him I am sorry and I will be more conscious of things in the future. We both left off mad and haven't spoken for the rest of the day. We have plans for the 4th and I don't know what to do. Do I bring it up again and say how upset I am that he things negative things about me (even though he is not the type to have those heart to heart talks) or do I just not say anything and try my best to enjoy our day and let it go and see what happens?

[karime2thestars]

I can only say that if you are being and have always been honest and above board with him, then his issues are his own to deal with and not yours. If you have never given him reason to distrust you, I would remind him of that and tell him that his lack of trust is hurting your relationship. Maybe he has been cheated on in the past or has dealt with a bad situation that is bringing baggage into your relationship. All you have to offer is your honesty and reassurance. If he still cannot trust you, then he needs to deal with his own issues. One of two things is happening, or both. Either he cannot be trusted and thinks you are like him or he has been hurt in the past by someone's dishonesty.