Ava111 Posted May 20, 2005 Share Posted May 20, 2005 I'm 36yrs old, I was seeing this 40yr old man for the past 8 months, only recently I had learned, he had a girlfriend of a year and half the entire time. I was completely devasted as I had developed strong feelings for him. He hid it so well. I ended up finding out about her by him leaving his cell phone around. After trying one of the numbers, I called and reached her. She told me who she was and I told her who I was, needless to say we exchanged stories both in disbelief. After all that has passed and letting him go, I found out that she is still with him after finding out he cheated on her with me for eight months. It angered me and still angers me because I believe women should stick together to set an example that women don't take cheater's period!!! I'm hurt and angry and I feel like I can't get past it....what can I do?? Any advice would be great appreciated. Thanks Link to comment
marijo2480 Posted May 20, 2005 Share Posted May 20, 2005 There's nothing you need to do! You've already moved on, haven't you? You were the smarter one here. The other woman is the one taking the risk of him doing this to her again, with yet another woman. Be glad that you didn't develop very strong feelings for him. Sorry that this happened to you, but glad it's over with now. Link to comment
DragonGirl724 Posted May 20, 2005 Share Posted May 20, 2005 i commend you for dealing with this so well...and maybe, she knew about you all along & played it off like "it was breaking news to her." or maybe shes very insecure & allows herself to 'love' someone like this...either way, as much as it befuddles you, dont let it plague you any longer. if shes with him, shes asking for a lot of trouble. we cant seem to find reason in people's stupid behavior sometimes....so why bother trying? -DG724 Link to comment
RayKay Posted May 20, 2005 Share Posted May 20, 2005 You did the right thing by walking away. While it is honorable you think all women should stick together - there is enough proof in the world that that is not always the case. Case in point, the many women who KNOWINGLY mess around with a guy they are very aware of being attached. It is her choice, just as much as it is yours. Move forward and you'll meet someone who is ALL yours Link to comment
volution Posted May 20, 2005 Share Posted May 20, 2005 On behalf of the good men that are out there, I apologise for this rogue insurgant who led you along... Please don't lose hope - don't lose hope at all - there is real love out there - there is honesty, romance, kindness, gentleness, communication, softness, tenderness from men - just have a little faith, a little faith, it's hard I know (I have the same problem thinking I'll find a decent woman), but please don't ever give up... Your morals are honorable - but sticking with someone who has done wrong by you in the most cruel way, someone who lied, cheated, used, abused you, saw you as just an object rather than a person or a soul - you should never stand by them to set an example... The best example you can set, is not resigning yourself to the myth that all men are bad... The best thing you can do is find a decent man, who will treat you for the lady and princess that you are... Link to comment
marriedmom Posted May 20, 2005 Share Posted May 20, 2005 DragonGirl said it best! And truly, 8 months is only 8 months! Imagine if you had spent years with him? Or married such a man! Some people do allow themselves to "love" people like that because they are indeed insecure. Good for you for moving on. Link to comment
millaj Posted May 20, 2005 Share Posted May 20, 2005 My situation was so similar, but I got pregnant.. the advice I give you would be run as fast away from that man and that situation as possible.. it will be worse if you stick around. *hug* Link to comment
annie24 Posted May 21, 2005 Share Posted May 21, 2005 Hey - definitely - you handled things well. I am very glad you walked away. Uggg! What a two-timing jerk! Yes, I do think that women should stick together and not put up with this type of behavior. I think that if all women didn't tolerate crap like this, there would be a lot more better behaved men out there. Ok - I should be sexist. If ALL people didn't tolerate crap like that, there would be a lot more better behaved MEN and WOMEN out there! People will do whatever they can get away with... I think with your strong morals Ava, you will meet a man who is a good match for you! Good luck! Link to comment
RandomAdvisor Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 Let her have the jerk. If she wants to stick herself in a dead end relationship with someone she knows to be a liar and a cheat, more power to her. You on the other hand have done the smart and responsible thing: you left him. Hopefully the next person you meet wont be bad. Link to comment
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