Is it me or is he the problem

[1a1a]

Even if he wasn’t abusive, a person who lays that much insecurity on their partner is in no fit condition to have a partner. 
 

He would need to go and work on his baggage around being cheated on, alone, heal the wounds, not bring that baggage to the next relationship for, sure enough, endlessly accusing your partner of cheating is like salting the earth, no plants can grow here. 
 

If nothing ever changes how long will you stay? A month, 6? A year? 5 years? He sounds like death by a thousand cuts and I think you’ll be better off alone than under constant corrosive attack. Wishing you strength to steer your life where you want it to go. (Remember you can only control your own actions)

[Wiseman2]

7 hours ago, Witchesden87 said:

Why can't he see that he is the problem it's him who has the issues  I mean how do you prove to a guy that swears blind your a liar

Abusers have huge egos that are fed by controlling and destroying others.

Don't bother telling him he's the problem. Don't bother jumping through hoops to prove anything.

He thinks of you as as dog in obedience training. It's part of the gaslighting to wear you down  

Start now reading up on abuse. Start privately and confidentiality reaching out to trusted friends, family, neighbors, and a doctor 

This is why he controls your phone. So you can't escape or have autonomy .