Jnnfer Posted May 12, 2019 Share Posted May 12, 2019 Hi, I’m trying to get over a breakup. I feel dumb. It only lasted two months but I fell for him hard and he did too. We met at a facility for people who are disabled. I guess that’s why it wasn’t so powerful. I feel dumb. I want to get over it. I feel so dumb that I have such intense feelings even though it only lasted two months. Thank you and God bless, Jnnfer Link to comment
Cope Posted May 12, 2019 Share Posted May 12, 2019 It doesn't matter how long it lasted, your feelings are real. Treat it as any other break up, you're not dumb! You're human, it's perfectly normal! Link to comment
Littler Posted May 12, 2019 Share Posted May 12, 2019 You'll eventually learn to get over it and move on. You just need to be patient (easier said than done, I know). Link to comment
Jnnfer Posted May 12, 2019 Author Share Posted May 12, 2019 Thank you for replying back, Cope. I guess I’m not perfect when you say it’s perfectly normal. I fall in love easily and don’t get over people easily. Link to comment
Jnnfer Posted May 12, 2019 Author Share Posted May 12, 2019 Littler, Yeah. Patience. It’s funny because he said I needed more patience, and it hurts. I’ll move on eventually and be patient. Life will go on. I predict 6 months from now. Link to comment
Cope Posted May 12, 2019 Share Posted May 12, 2019 Thank you for replying back, Cope. I guess I’m not perfect when you say it’s perfectly normal. I fall in love easily and don’t get over people easily. I don't get it. It IS perfectly normal. Heck, most relationships I've broken up with lately were short term. Hurts like hell. Sometimes it feels worse than long term because you didn't get the chance to give it a shot and you're left with questions of what could it become etc. Falling in love easily is a different story. Do you fall in love with anyone? Do you fall in love just because you want to be in love? Edit to add: do you move fast in a relationship? That's not good, I'm not gonna say it scares people away, but you need to get to know the other person before you decide you really want to be with them Link to comment
Jnnfer Posted May 12, 2019 Author Share Posted May 12, 2019 Oh, I see. Feelings are normal. I don’t fall in love with just anyone. I’m picky. I guess I do fall in love just to be in love. I move very fast in relationships, the last two of my relationships were involving talks of marriage. It probably does scare people away. It definitely scares me now. I’d rather make sure he’s a good person before dating him. But back to feelings, I guess my biggest lesson is that feelings are feelings. It’s okay to feel my feelings :) Link to comment
Littler Posted May 12, 2019 Share Posted May 12, 2019 Jnnfer: If it makes you feel any better, you can try to analyze what went "wrong." Just understand that you may not find anything and even if you did, you'll be undertaking this analysis with the benefit for hindsight. Link to comment
Littler Posted May 12, 2019 Share Posted May 12, 2019 Oh, I see. Feelings are normal. I don’t fall in love with just anyone. I’m picky. I guess I do fall in love just to be in love. I move very fast in relationships, the last two of my relationships were involving talks of marriage. It probably does scare people away. It definitely scares me now. I’d rather make sure he’s a good person before dating him. But back to feelings, I guess my biggest lesson is that feelings are feelings. It’s okay to feel my feelings :) You don't need to rush things, especially talks about marriage. It's not fair, but it can really scare away people who would otherwise be worthwhile partners. Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted May 13, 2019 Share Posted May 13, 2019 Sorry to hear this. Breakups suck. However make sure you are understanding the difference between intensity and intimacy. Try to reflect on that. Does this facility offer counselling or group support to help you overall as well as with setbacks and disappointments? Link to comment
Snflwrgrl Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 Your heartbreak is not ridiculous. Big hug! The prospect of new love can be very exciting and a time full of hope so when it doesn’t work out, it can be very disappointing. I’m sorry you are going through this. You are not alone. I will be praying for you this week, for your tender heart to start healing. I’m glad you reached out. Link to comment
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