Move On or Not?

[daisy215]

Okay, I'll try to make this as short as possible!

I dated this guy for a year and I really thought he was the one (I'm 25 & he's 27). We broke up 2 1/2 months ago. All in all we had a good relationship (went through some minor spats here and there that all couples go through - no biggie). We talked about our future a lot, talked about getting married. He told me he has never felt this way about anyone before, he can really see himself with me, etc. The problem, which is a big one to me, is that he never once told me that he loved me. So one evening we had a discussion about our relationship and I expressed my concerns. He told me that he knows I am perfect for him and I told him that if I was really the one for him it wouldn't be so hard to figure out what he wants and he wouldn't be so scared and that if he really loved me he wouldn't have a problem telling me. He told me that he thinks he is scared because he knows I am the one. He told me that he just felt like he needed to take a step back and make sure that things were right and that he wasn't forcing them, so we broke up.

We had no contact for 6 weeks and unfortunately I'm the one who caved in and called. We had a really nice conversation and didn't talk too much about our relationship (I called because I was missing him, but I didn't want to force the relationship thing - just called to talk). He told me that he missed me and had thought a lot about me, but didn't call because he still doesn't know what he wants. We've talked briefly since then about the relationship and he said that he doesn't know why he couldn't let it work out and if the issues were something with us or something with him that he's going to have to deal with and it won't matter who he is with.

So it sucks because I love him and I miss him and I've talked to my friends and they say just give him space and it'll work out, but I don't know. I guess I just want to know what you all think and has anyone had or known anybody in a situation like this? Has anyone taken breaks with someone and gotten back together and had it work out? I guess I just think that if I were the one for him it wouldn't be this hard for him. Also, I keep thinking he's 27, get it together a little bit! We haven't talked in 2 weeks again.

So much for keeping it short!

[DragonGirl724]

ok i had an ex feed me the same crap! DONT WASTE ANOTHER SECOND ON HIM! he is not worth your time. let him go. he wants to 'figure out what he wants' say: good go ahead. but dont expect me to wait around for you!..AND DONT!!!

 

dont tolerate this "im in limbo" CRAP! b/c thats exactly what it is. dont spend any more time pondering & wondering what hes thinking/feeling etc. WHO CARES! he is too indecicive for youre own good. find someone with a head on his shoulders & knows what he wants in a mate & in life. dont waste your time elsewhere. take my word. i dealt with an idiot like this before. dont waste your time & energy on someone who isnt worth it.

 

goodluck.

 

-DG724

[marolua]

I can really feel your pain, it seems that you have loved this man very much. There has been people who have borken up and got back again, but don't forget that statistically a very small number of couples do this.

 

I think you should let him go, but not like waiting until he calls you again. try to live your life on your own, not only waiting for him coming back, but giving yourself a real break and engaging in your own stuff.

 

And don't forget to think about whether you can be content with spending the rest of your life with someone who is not sure whether he is loving you or not? You are worth more than that!!

Good luck,

[spiderman_56]

6 weeks of no contact is a long time ...way too long time ...

 

I too dislike the fact to tell a girl that I love her even if I really love her .. there is a feeling of discomfort and weakness associated to it so either she says and replies to it or I answer if she asks it but on my own ...almost never ..maybe once when i got drunk .... lol

 

but for the guy ... nobody need 6 weeks of no contact to determine if they like a bf/gf or not ... drop the case he is not into you or has lost interest ...