Jump to content

Afraid of new people joining work


Recommended Posts

Hey everyone! It's been a long time I have been able to post on here. I hope this is the right category that I'm posting in.

 

I work as IT Engineer in a small - medium business company. We have one single head office with around 20 employees. I recently figured out that I am afraid of new people joining work. I usually don't have trouble interacting with people at work or anything and usually I am considered to be a friendly, responsible & reliable chap.

 

But I just know this fear and I can't quite place the reason why. The HR team is quite close to me as I am from the IT department and they have system issues mostly. I hear from them about new people joining and then I feel uncomfortable till the joining date of the new employee.

 

I find myself sluggish when I think about it, though I don't fret about it the whole time but whenever I remember it, I feel uncomfortable. I can't quite put the feeling in words but it feels something like someone is going to come in and wreck the social balance I have going on... Not sure if that's the exact feeling.. :upset:

 

I'm not sure if this is important, but I wouldn't call myself outgoing and I do like to avoid parties with a lot of friends or large crowds of friends, if I can help it. I'm not a crowd guy but I am usually comfortable with meeting up with friends and definitely am social at work and even outside.

 

And if it is worth mentioning, the last time I had this issue was when a new guy had joined and it kinda disappeared after we met and talked a few times. We are actually friends now.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I was going to say that maybe you're just shy around people you don't know. Your last sentence sort of clinches it, that now you're friends with the last new guy.

 

I'm sort of the same way too. If I know someone, no problem. If I don't know someone, people think I'm aloof and unfriendly, until I get to know them.

 

Just relax. Keep your head down. You don't immediately have to be friendly with a new guy. See what he's all about first.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I feel the same way actually.

 

Any new additions to a team can totally change the dynamic. I think that’s where my concern comes from - a fear of change, a fear that this good thing won’t be so good, etc. Do you think they could be it?

 

Yes, something like this. Though I'm the only one in my department and whoever comes won't make a difference in my department at least, the fear stays for a while and sometimes I find myself a bit worried or anxious in brief lapses of time when I actually remember it.... Yes, fear of change, fear that the guy is going to be a pita.. how to adjust with him.. something like that I guess.. Does this classify as some kind of disorder? :O

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I was going to say that maybe you're just shy around people you don't know. Your last sentence sort of clinches it, that now you're friends with the last new guy.

 

I'm sort of the same way too. If I know someone, no problem. If I don't know someone, people think I'm aloof and unfriendly, until I get to know them.

 

Just relax. Keep your head down. You don't immediately have to be friendly with a new guy. See what he's all about first.

 

Its nice to see that I'm not the only guy feeling this. I know that I don't have to be friendly with a new guy just as he arrives. But I wish I could get rid of that uncomfortable feeling. Friends I know at work are least bothered if a new guy is coming or not.. I feel that's how it should be.. At least why even worry abt a guy even before he hasnt come? I know the logic but can't help it.. hehe

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I just thought about it and something came to my mind.... That a bit of my problem is that I could be given responsibilities which I didn't sign up for. As you might know, the IT department is usually the department considered as "jobless" by most people. Simply because the IT guy might just appear to be free at times unless there's some emergency or system issue. Where I work, I do share some of the things that's actually not my responsibility. Part of my initial voluntary support when I joined the company, I extended to the accounts department and others, so basically it became part of my job and I can't walk out on that now.

 

Though I enjoy being useful and generally support everyone at work, I have learnt to say no to things that are not my responsibility, since I realized that people would definitely try to use you if you make yourself available.

 

So sometimes I do feel a new guy is going to have to do some new stuff and I might just be asked to help him out (not by the new guy but the management), which I don't really want to do coz its not my job. So I might just have to say no to someone or argue with someone if it is forced on me.. This is an inherent part of the fear, though it might not be the entire reason for the fear.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

SIGNS OF A TOXIC BOSS | THERAPIST R...
SIGNS OF A TOXIC BOSS | THERAPIST REACTS TO RAISSA KENGNE

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...