Crossing the Line?

[daisy]

If your partner considers you as his/her bestfriend, would it be okay for your significant other to have a best friend of the oppossite sex, in which he/she frequently keeps in touch with while in a relationship?

 

Is it okay for your partner to have a bestfriend of the oppossite sex (outside of the relationship) in which he/she finds physically attractive? What if your partner denies having any romantic feelings for this person? Is he/she bs-ing?

[ShySoul]

People can and do have friends of either gender, even best friends. This is fine in a relationship. The important thing is to realize that this is only a friend and nothing more. I don't know the circumstances, but say they grew up with each other and have been friends since childhood. Or they are friends from way back. That's fine. And I'm sure that your partner may at some point or another find someone else physically attractive. But know that he isn't with that person, he is with you. As long as he is spending as much time as possible with you and its clear how much he cares for you, you should have nothing to worry about. The only way it could be a problem is if he starts to spend more time with her then with you. Hopefully that won't happen.

[JackH]

thats tough, because i can easily see feeling like, "well, what if..." i know that i wouldn't like it, but at the same time, as someone's b/f or g/f, you can't be jealous and be taking away all their friends. i don't have an answer as to whether or not its' ok, all i can say is that it sucks, but it's part of the whole deal...if you want that person bad enough, you'll take them with all their friends.

[sk2000]

If its a platonic friendship, its pretty difficult to create sexual tension between the two, especially if they have been friends for a while. But your insecurities could create a problem if you try to justify it. So trust him.

I think ShySoul (Good lookin out!) got it in a nutshell

"As long as he is spending as much time as possible with you and its clear how much he cares for you, you should have nothing to worry about. The only way it could be a problem is if he starts to spend more time with her then with you."

[daisy]

Thanks guys, for all of your responses!

[lovelynns]

If its a platonic friendship, its pretty difficult to create sexual tension between the two

 

Has nobody here seen When Harry Met Sally?

 

In my experience, a guy and a girl can never be platonic friends (unless one of them is gay, I guess). It may start platonic, but hey, it usually does.

 

You can never be completely fulfilled with just one person, you need friends in your life other than your significant other - this is for sure.

 

My boyfriend has a couple of female friends he's known since the 4th grade. They're married now though, so I don't worry.

 

Ultamately, if it makes you jealous or wonder about them, then it's a problem, right?