Moving on is really hard to do

[Ollie636]

Feeling down today

Need to move on somehow even though it's only been 2 months since my breakup.

Hard to describe my emotions at the moment. Sadness is one for sure. Strange that I have moments when I feel positive and moments when i feel negative about my current situation. The loneliness is the hardest part of all of this. Being without her and the house I lived in with her family and my son, to my home now with my son and I. Part of me was happy there, and the other part wanted out. So much confusion when I look back.

I want to learn from all I've experienced over the past 2 years, valuable lessons about myself. I suppose I am angry with myself for putting myself, my son and daughter through all of this. It feels like wasted time, but I know it shouldn't feel that way. Lots of things just didn't work in the relationship. We had no real common interests. Everything I liked was mocked by her. I never made fun of her interests. I never brought up my problems with her, I wasn't open enough. She changed after the first year or so. Became more controlling in a way. Her initial flood of admiration and what I took to be love, dwindled slowly away. She was never sympathetic towards me, sometimes putting me down. Why did I put up with it all? Was I really in love with her? Was It just lust? Or did I just need her presence and company in my life at that particular time? Did we really bond emotionally? I think we both deep down needed rescuing from our past, and didn't ever truly open up to each other. She became quite cruel towards the end, I can see that now. Frustrated that I never told her how I felt about that. I really need to let her go, after all the processing I've done in my head about the relationship I should be able to start now surely! The anger comes back, and so does the pain. Just when you thought it wouldn't anymore.

[DaisyMayPorter]

“Lots of things didn’t work in the relationship.”

 

Ollie, sounds like you did the right thing by breaking up. Time heals all wounds. This too shall pass.

[SweetGirl28]

I'm sorry :(

You are going through the normal process, and it's only been two months.

Time has to heal this. You most likely aren't missing her, you're just feeling lonely.

She was not good for you, it's obvious by how you've described her.

Look at this as a lesson learned of what you don't want, and that you deserve to be

treated better, and cut off any woman early on that is disrespectful towards you like she was.

Women like her do not make good partners, they will chip away at your self esteem until you

feel worthless. Believe in yourself, be the best you that you can be, and hopefully you will attract

someone who values you, as much as you them. Good luck, it will get better (((hugs)))

[beebs82]

I'm sorry too. It comes in waves. Some waves are so crushing and paralyzingly. Some waves you can ride out the clarity and clearness that it was the right decision. Sometimes you get sucked under a wave. And then sometimes you ride it to shore. Feel whatever you need to feel at the moment. Embrace the loneliness. Embrace the good and bad feelings. Because every feeling is healing.