snkv Posted January 3, 2018 Share Posted January 3, 2018 Hello to all! So, I had a pretty nasty breakup from a 8 year relationship, I've started dating another girl, everything was going well for about an year. She was fully aware of my situation, but just as I achieved closure with my ex girlfriend, there was a week and a half radio silence from the other girl. And one day she messaged me that she is in a relationship now. I was beyond stunned. We've talked about our previous life experiences, and she told me about an older guy, with whom she had a fling back in the day, but he was always unavailable for her, because he was always busy with different things. Long story short, he is back in her life, and she suddenly started to feel as "the backup plan" or something like that, for me. I have invested so much time, money and effort in building this new relationship, whilst she decided to get back to that other person, as if by magic. They are together for about 4 months now, I have lost all hope of getting back together, she told me things that I did not want to hear, or actually did not imagined I would hear. She told me "things are as they are, we can't change that" , "I want to give this new relationship another try" , "but hey, no one said we can't be together in the future" , "me and you, we are a perfect match, but this other thing happened, so..". I immediately started NC on the first 2 weeks of her new relationship, and up until 21 Dec 2017 she was contacting me for random reasons, just to tie up small talk. So I need her to stop contacting me, so I deleted/blocked her on all social media. Then she contacts me saying "I did not expect that from you, this made me extremely sad, explain the reason". I did not manage to hold my feelings the last time, and I told her that it is hurting me to even think about her. She said she understands, and despite that, she contacted me again for Christmas. However, she did not contact me on NYE, so I guess it is all over now. Trouble is, I can't stop thinking about her, no matter what, and this is driving me insane. Hope arises each day, despite my trial and error to suppress it. My main thoughts on this is, that the other guy was feeling desperate, and got his luck while she felt down at some point, and this is some kind of a rebound relationship, since she was contacting me throughout the whole time they were together. What should I do? Link to comment
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