How do i talk to my shy crush

[Mluvsyou]

Sooo i posted the past thread and now i think im gonna try to be confident and just talk to the shy guy because he might be interested but if i dont try, i cant get him to talk to me. The only problem is that it’s winter break and I dont see him for awhile and im scared that when we go back to school he mightve lost the interest (it maybe small but still matters). Even when we go back to school and if he still has interest, i know i wont be able to talk to him. To be more straightforward, i want to gain confidence but I dont know how to converse w him after i made awkward attempts before and even after he rejected my invite to go out twice before. (Please read the past thread i posted, ya girl needs help) thank you and please help

[DanZee]

Are you sure he has an interest in you? You said you asked him out to lunch twice (which you didn't say in your original post). If you're still in the same class as he is, you can always ask him about homework or something to do with the class as a way of finding a reason to talk with him. You can ask him out to lunch one more time, but now I don't think it's a lack of confidence on your part. Unless he's afraid of girls, he just may not be interested.

[Mluvsyou]

Are you sure he has an interest in you? You said you asked him out to lunch twice (which you didn't say in your original post). If you're still in the same class as he is, you can always ask him about homework or something to do with the class as a way of finding a reason to talk with him. You can ask him out to lunch one more time, but now I don't think it's a lack of confidence on your part. Unless he's afraid of girls, he just may not be interested.

 

Oh man you said that i might lack confidence before... thats what i said hes very shy and doesnt talk to girls at all. hes never had a girlfriend and before this one girl liked him and he knew about jt and kept avoiding her. He keeps giving mixed signals and thats why i was confused before.

[firelily]

I have to admit, if I were you, I'd be just as confused if this guy is interested but hopeless or likes you but not enough to make things happen. I'm 30 and I couldn't tell, so it's ok that you're not a mind reader here. But anyway, you don't have to know his feelings for sure to come up with the best strategy! You're human. You're a young shy girl, trying to act the best you can in this situation. If it doesn't work out, maybe it will another time.

 

I think confidence you seek just comes with time and experience (both good or bad). You will meet an interesting boy, but you will be too shy and miss some chance. You will get angry at yourself for that, so the next time you'll try super hard for somebody, but it will turn out that person is not worth it. So the next time, you will recognize that there is a chance to make things happen, and you will know by then you have it in you to let go of shyness, to ask someone out, but you'll have limits. And maybe in years it will turn out that person used to like you back, but so what? You'll be happily married by then, to someone who made it less difficult.

 

In this situation, I think I would make it clear that now it's the guy's move if he wants something out of it, it doesn't have to be big, may be small, but you already asked him once and he didn't go through with it so the ball is kinda at his court. It's still possible that he's interested in you but just a hopeless case, but you can't keep pulling him out of his shell all the time, can you?

 

Also, you shouldn't be ashamed of liking him at all. There's no reason to say something to him then run away. I'm sure you're a nice catch - you already have a boyfriend and now you have this guy's attention. There is nothing embarrassing about you liking him, it's an honour!

 

Also, there's no reason to pretend ignore him out of pride. It doesn't help things either way! It's just a pointless thing to do.

 

Try to close your eyes and accept the awkwardness of all of it, realize your personal worth, how many friends like you for who you are - and from this place try to act confidently, directly, but don't be too giving or self-sacrificing too. Give only as much attention as you feel comfortable with giving.

[Galidan]

Listen society always pressumes the man who should approach the woman, but the ones who do approach any woman and not scared are the 1 precent, those guys who are players and break your hurt at the end, we live in 2018 already, you can go and check it out, if you get rejected, it means you went for it which is hard to achieve be proud when you do, and no regrets huh.He might be a good guy, and not a jerk. GO for it in my opinion.

[Mluvsyou]

I found out today that he has talked to his sister about me and she said it was good things, but when she was asked if he talks about me in that way, she responded with a “i cant tell you that.” Is this a good thing?

[Mluvsyou]

I have to admit, if I were you, I'd be just as confused if this guy is interested but hopeless or likes you but not enough to make things happen. I'm 30 and I couldn't tell, so it's ok that you're not a mind reader here. But anyway, you don't have to know his feelings for sure to come up with the best strategy! You're human. You're a young shy girl, trying to act the best you can in this situation. If it doesn't work out, maybe it will another time.

 

I think confidence you seek just comes with time and experience (both good or bad). You will meet an interesting boy, but you will be too shy and miss some chance. You will get angry at yourself for that, so the next time you'll try super hard for somebody, but it will turn out that person is not worth it. So the next time, you will recognize that there is a chance to make things happen, and you will know by then you have it in you to let go of shyness, to ask someone out, but you'll have limits. And maybe in years it will turn out that person used to like you back, but so what? You'll be happily married by then, to someone who made it less difficult.

 

In this situation, I think I would make it clear that now it's the guy's move if he wants something out of it, it doesn't have to be big, may be small, but you already asked him once and he didn't go through with it so the ball is kinda at his court. It's still possible that he's interested in you but just a hopeless case, but you can't keep pulling him out of his shell all the time, can you?

 

Also, you shouldn't be ashamed of liking him at all. There's no reason to say something to him then run away. I'm sure you're a nice catch - you already have a boyfriend and now you have this guy's attention. There is nothing embarrassing about you liking him, it's an honour!

 

Also, there's no reason to pretend ignore him out of pride. It doesn't help things either way! It's just a pointless thing to do.

 

Try to close your eyes and accept the awkwardness of all of it, realize your personal worth, how many friends like you for who you are - and from this place try to act confidently, directly, but don't be too giving or self-sacrificing too. Give only as much attention as you feel comfortable with giving.

 

 

I found out today that he has talked to his sister about me and she said it was good things, but when she was asked if he talks about me in that way, she responded with a “i cant tell you that.” Is this a good thing?