fspro10 Posted December 20, 2017 Share Posted December 20, 2017 Hello. I am almost 19 years old. In this post I will describe my actual situation. I don't really know where to start from. So I just started college in October and right from the first day I saw this girl and I felt like I fell in love instantly. Then I realized we were actually class-mates. And then I found out she likes me back. She has made it pretty obvious but right now I'm feeling very down and depressed, with very low self-esteem. I get so panicked when she's around me that instead of being nice to her and talking to her I ignore her because I just don't know what to say, I am afraid of screwing it up. One of the reasons is that I'm suffering from a pretty severe form of acne on my whole body and if we hooked up it would have probably led to getting intimate with each other. Earlier this day, I met with a friend of her, who is also a mate from our class, I said "hello" to her friend and I could see her (the girl that I really like) turning her back so I won't see her. I know it may sound like something casual or unimportant but that was a moment when I realized that I really ed up. I've also been bullied through high-school and I think this played a role in the decrease of my self-esteem also. It did put me down so bad that I'm so afraid of talking to people so bad so instead I will just ignore everyone. A few years earlier, when the bullying started, and I saw that people were heads, I was thinking like " it, I don't need everyone". But a few experiences have made me realized that this attitude doesn't fit me. I am naturally a very sensitive and motivated guy. I don't know what to do, where to start from. Going back to the situation about that girl, I feel like all I wanna do is hug her and tell her that I'm sorry. If this seems hard to read/understand, I apologize, I'm a bit drunk right now writing this. The only good thing about these years is that I started a youtube channel that makes me a few hundred bucks every month. I would talk to my parents about my situation but I feel like it's just too much to tell them, I feel like I should be the one who finds a way through this BS. I know that I shouldn't put the blame on other people, but I have been so open and friendly to the wrong people in the past that I have ended up the one who got hurt. Sometimes my actions are like a 14 year old's, I tend to be very immature. I don't know what to do and where to start from... Link to comment
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.