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I broke up with girlfriend - is she in a rebound relationship? I want her back!


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Hey guys and girls,

I‘ve been browsing this site for quite a while in order to find comforting threads that fit to my situation. I am 21 years old and my ex girlfriend will turn 19 in december.

We share somewhat of a long history. I‘ll try to stay brief:

2013: got to know her - not much contact

Winter 2014: texted her about a year after i got to know her - we met and kissed for about 2-3 weeks. At some point she just left me sitting for another guy

Winter 2015: i texted her again just to catch up. We met once - nothing special.

Spring 2016: i texted her again. We met and kissed and got to be a couple and we confessed everything that has happened since 2014 and she was sorry for what she has done and told me she always had stronger feelings for me and after a while we started loving and we had a relationship of 1,5 years.


Oct 2017: i decided to break up, because i stopped investing my heart and soul into the relationship. We had fights and everything but we loved each other. But we broke up.


A few days later, we exchanged our things and she suggested to stay in NC until new years and then see what happens. My mistake: even though i accepted, i kept pushing her away.

Then when i was about to start thinking about the relationship and the damage i‘ve done to her love, i started missing her badly. Then it happened: i found out she is already dating someone new. I was (am) devestated. The girl that loved me to death now just replaced me?


I am determined to get her back because i know for sure one thing: love like that does not die after a few weeks of breaking up. We talked after that and she said that she still has feelings for me but also for the new guy.


I gave her all my love throghout the relationship. Everything was great until we started to have those minor fights that tested my patience long term. I lost it the last couple of months and thats where everything went downhill. Now: i‘ve been thinking a lot about everything and i now see the reasons for breaking up and i also realized the value she had in my life and i am convinced that i (we) can recive the relationship - better and stronger! But when i mentioned that i want to be with her again, she turned cold and said she doesn‘t know what she wants (while being with the new guy)

But i need help from you guys..:

- does she still care about me?

- is her new (rebound?) relationship serious? (The guy she is with is my exact opposite and the type of guy she would never, ever go for)

- how great are my chances of getting her back?

- i will stay NC until new years to give her space to think. But i really hope it‘s not going to work out with that guy..


I‘m scared that he sweet talks her all the time and that he talks her into not wanting me anymore. I have enough self confidence to know, that i am a lot better lover and boyfriend than that she is with right now. Our relationship and love was real. I feel like she is just trying to numb her feelings by being with him. But do you think this will work long term?

Please..i am getting really desperate. I am trying to get along with all that. Have been working out and spending a lot of time with my dad. Also i am trying to get along with the thought to never have her again.

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Don't break up with people you want to be with.


You loved her so much but you didn't even try to work on the relationship. If you can't love her through some "minor fights" and are willing to walk because your patience was tested?


Why would she want to get back together with someone who so easily walked away and is only interested now that his assumption that she would still be there for him, has proven incorrect?


I think if you respect her, if you still love her, then you leave her alone and let her figure out her new relationship.

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