Break?

[piya]

I wanted some advice. So me and my bf dated for about a year and half and we had gotten promise rings and stuff but it's kinda hard for us to hang out and to txt much cause of college and we usually see each other at work and sometimes we get a chance we go outside to chill. We were fine until two Sunday ago after I left work he was acting weird but I thought he was stressed with college test so I gave him space. Then Monday thru Friday he has been ignoring me and the one day Wednesday he fell asleep and texted me late since he was so tired. Then he ignored me again and then on Friday he went to his friend bonfire and I heard that from someone else. I was trying to ask him Wednesday if he was free to hang out Saturday but he didn't reply so I said let me try Friday so I talked to him but he was acting and texting weird. Then I told him I'm worried like why was he acting that way so Saturday I met him at work. Then he give me a hug and then says I think we should go on a break and then I said why and stuff and he said it was college and that we been texting just as friends and that college is really kicking him. So I told him to let's go out of the work place cause I didn't want someone to see me cry so we went out and I said that relationship are things we can work out and go up and downs and if doesn't work then we can go on a break but he didn't want that. He said to me I was ready to get settled and he is not and I told him I am but I'm not ready right now I want to spend time with u get to know u. Then I cried and after couple second he gave me a tight hug and said to me that college is kicking him with a lot of stuff he said he won't have the time to give me because he wanted to focus on college right now and on him since so much happened to him that week. Then he said it's not u that u did something it's me. Then we had to go back inside the work place and then I told him I didn't want to go on a break but I will give him the break. He said i was a really nice girl and stuff and he doesn't deserve me and then I asked if this was a breakup or just a break he said it was a break a pause until the end of the semester I said what if it happens next semester he said it won't and he said to me if (I) not him to pick back up where we left off and he said he wanted to still be friends and talk. Then he said he wanted to throw up and then I said the same and he gave me his water to drink. Then after that day he stared at me then he seemed so out of it Sunday he ignored me and this Saturday I opened and so did he and he said morning and I said morning as well. That was all. So what should I do??? Do no contact rule or should I talk to him as friends and talk to him face to face to see if that what he wants or give him space I'm so confused I was thinking to txt him this I was thinking to say.

 

Hey! Im sorry if I'm disturbing you but I know you said we can be friends and I just wanted to clarify if it was okay to talk as friends once In a blue moon. I know since last week we haven't been really talking or ignoring each other but I want to come past that and be friends if that's okay with you

 

Then I also asked him during that Saturday when he said for the break if I should take the ring of and he said it's up to me if I wanted to or not and he will understand. I still really love him and would like to be with him. But I'm so confused if I should give him space or talk to him as friends

[SadSadgirl]

Do no contact. If things were not to work out, no contact will help you adjust to life without him. I’m in the same situation right now, I haven’t had a convo with him in about a week. It hurts but I’m worrying about myself, as should you. Best of luck x

[piya]

Do no contact. If things were not to work out, no contact will help you adjust to life without him. I’m in the same situation right now, I haven’t had a convo with him in about a week. It hurts but I’m worrying about myself, as should you. Best of luck x

 

I'm scared what if he doesn't say anything to me. People are telling me that since he said we can be friends we should at least talk and idk I feel like I should but then I shouldn't cause it's not a break up it's just a break

[SadSadgirl]

He’s stressed about school, you’re stressed about your relationship. You are bound to bring up the relationship during your ‘friendship’, which could stress him even more. No contact gives a person breathing room, it also allows a person to miss you, which could be beneficial for you if you want him back.

[piya]

He’s stressed about school, you’re stressed about your relationship. You are bound to bring up the relationship during your ‘friendship’, which could stress him even more. No contact gives a person breathing room, it also allows a person to miss you, which could be beneficial for you if you want him back.

 

We see each other at work it's kinda hard to not talk nd it's weird what if I say I would not bring any relationship thing up nd just talk to him normally then? Should I be friends

[Jomerta85]

Look they say love is blind but from the outside looking in the the situation and relationship dynamic couldn’t be clearer. College or no college a guy isn’t just going to remove the only supply of physical affection and emotional support that one can only get from someone that loves them, especially when you are willing to be unreasonably accommodating to anything they want. For your own sake don’t be friends, don’t give him any of the benefits of having you in his life. And for the love of god don’t have sex. If he can still get your listening ears your advice your affection without a commitment to you then your teaching him that he never should commit because he can have his cake and eat it to. The fact he just suddenly changed becoming cold and distant and when he had free time he chose to not spend it with you tells me someone else most likely has his attention. His guilt is causing him to say things like “ this is his fault “ and he doesn’t deserve you because he knows he is doing something wrong.

[boltnrun]

This thread exists three times. Can they be combined?

[KE1206]

It is very obvious he is playing you. School isn't too much for him, he wants to be free to sleep with other girls. If he cares about you he would never ignore you...ever. he is trying to keep you around as a back up in case he needs a girl and no one else is around. Don't let him treat you this way! He told you he isn't ready to settle down. That means he wants to have sex with other girls. He sounds like a jerk, look how he treats you, don't give him undeserved credit just because it hurts to be rejected. It will hurt more when you find out he is sleeping with multiple girls and playing then all!!