post break up crisis.

[ohcomeon]

Heyia.

 

I was in a relationship for 4 yrs with my ex, now currently

into a 4 month no contact situation.More or less, coz she will still contact.

 

I was feeling better @ some point, but the crisis is just around the

corner. Do people go through these ? Mine are really intense,

dreams of her and her new b/f out of the blue, headaches,

and general depression just popping up.

 

oh well.

[evidica]

ending a four year relationship will not be easy. If you have lasted four months already, good job! It will take some time, but yes those are general normal symptoms. Dont worry about it, your almost there.

[DN]

It could take a while longer and there will be ups and downs but you will get through. When measuring progress look at how you were a month ago not how you were yesterday and you will see how well you are really doing over time.

[ohcomeon]

Tanks for ur responses.

 

well, actually I am doing worse over time, but

Just these intense days one just can't handle are the

problematic ones.

 

My progress is like a sin wave

with very high frequency in the beginning and less

as time goes by, but amplitude stays the same.

 

oh well..

[Zerohero]

Yea some days gets really hard for me. I just try and focus on things I enjoy and imagine life without that person in the future. My ex a few weeks ago starting trying to contact me asking why I was not calling. She wanted to be friends etc. Of couse me being "a good guy" like I always am, I said yes but in my mind I KNOW that I'm not going to run after her anymore. You should do the same. Trust me it's very hard.

 

You can instant message me if you want to...

[here2understand2]

jee.."ohcomon" somthing tells me you are an engineer, are you?LOL!..nyways a 4 year thing is hard to get over, there are memories and lots of them, and if you really want to move on you've got to put those memories behind and keep yourself busy. If you've photographs, letters, memoirs that you shared or she gave you, collect them all and lock them in a cupboard and lose the key! yeah i am serious! lose the key! but dont destroy/burn them..I once regretted doing that after we became friends and all of that was lost so I went ahead and have her pose for me so that I could makeup for the lost photographs!LOL!..

Also, keep yourself busy..was there a hobby you neglected for a long time? pick it up, guitar, piano, dancing anything? go for it! right now is the best time, it'll keep ur mind off her and make u better at whatever you are doing! A hobby like learning dancing would be a great idea bcoz it'll make you meet more people! Ignore this idea if 'dancing' in any ways reminds you of her...and most importantly practice NC!..it works wonders for you!..best of luck and am happy you are moving on! hope this helps!