PaulWKM Posted March 6, 2017 Share Posted March 6, 2017 My girlfriend of almost 2 years broke up with me a couple months back. She started feeling like I was growing distant (which at the time I was) and it really got to her. One night after drinking she went to another man's house and cheated on me. Shortly after she left me because the thought of what she did to me was unbearable for her and she thinks i can find someone better than her who deserves me. I have been a wreck ever since because I love her so much, we keep in touch and she wants to be friends but all I want is her back which she says will never happen. She said she just doesn't have feelings for me anymore. We have hung out one time in person since it the breakup and when we hung out I saw the same love in her eyes as I did before. She really wants to just stay friends but I want her back so much. what should I do? Link to comment
Wiseman2 Posted March 6, 2017 Share Posted March 6, 2017 Sorry this happened. Don't torment yourself by accepting the friendzone and staying in touch. Why were you 'growing distant'? Go no contact, she can't miss you or respect you as 'friends'.One night after drinking she went to another man's house and cheated on me. we keep in touch and she wants to be friends but all I want is her back which she says will never happen. Link to comment
PaulWKM Posted March 6, 2017 Author Share Posted March 6, 2017 I was growing distant because both of us were unemployed and spent every hour together. its not that i didnt like it i was starting to feel like we were in a rut and i didnt really realize it at the time. Link to comment
ShatteredMan Posted March 6, 2017 Share Posted March 6, 2017 She started feeling like I was growing distant (which at the time I was) and it really got to her. One night after drinking she went to another man's house and cheated on me. Shortly after she left me because the thought of what she did to me was unbearable for her and she thinks i can find someone better than her who deserves me. As painful and heartless as this may sound, you've answered your own question: She is done with your relationship and she is done with you in terms of love and respect (clearly). What should you do? Ask yourself if you deserve this. Ask yourself if you could ever trust someone who goes into another someone else's bed while in a relationship with you. (See the "Infidelity" subforum) I'm willing to bet that you are in the denial stage of grief. Its okay. We've all gone through it. It may not seem like it now, but by cutting her off completely (and by this I mean: Delete her numbers/email addresses/viber contacts, unfriend her and then GET OFF OF FACEBOOK/INSTAGRAM IMMEDIATELY AND COMPLETELY, do not drive by her place or where she hangs out) and disappearing like a fart in the wind, you begin the healing process. Also, if she does wonder about what you're doing, the inability to have any knowledge as to what you're up to will drive her nuts. But you have to go strict No Contact. If you CHOOSE to stay on social media and pursue her, you will (without a doubt) eventually push her away without any chance of reconciliation. It will also allow you to begin healing and improving yourself for someone that you can trust, grow with and love -- and get the same in return. Become the man that she wishes she could have in her life but do not give her the satisfaction of having you back. You may have neglected the relationship but you didn't cheat (as far as you've told us) and probably broke up because of her indiscretion. As much as you want her back, its unlikely at this point and she's telling you that. It sucks but you should use this as motivation to improve yourself for someone who truly deserves you and everything that you can bring to a relationship. And if you think that you can't do it, you're dead wrong. Link to comment
J Miracle Posted March 6, 2017 Share Posted March 6, 2017 The whole "you've become distant" thing, and the "you deserve someone better".. Load of crap. Dont focus on these generic catch phrases she regurgitated for you. She doesnt want you, simple. She cheated and can't be trusted. There's no love in her eyes, and there's nothing friendly 'bout that zone your in. The only thing you can believe from her is the "she doesnt have feelings for me anymore" line. Link to comment
shellyf62 Posted March 6, 2017 Share Posted March 6, 2017 Im sorry this happened to you, but do you really want a woman you cant trust back? Link to comment
Alsananick Posted March 8, 2017 Share Posted March 8, 2017 No reconsiliation mate. No contact and move on. If you dont wanna re-experience it with her. Link to comment
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