I need an attitude adjustment ::BAD::

[QTpie87]

Ok heres the thing,

 

a lot of people here already know about my family problems. Well i used to be able to act mature and deal with it well with out getting mean, and now i can't. I totally lose it when sticking up for my self and end up looking like a complete phyco path. just as if not more immuture as they are being. I don't like who i have become, I have started to swear a lot, put others down, and treat everyone how I feel I am treated.

I don't want to be like this, I want to change, I want to be nice when others are mean and I want to make them feel good about themselfs even when i am being put down, because i feel that it is a big part of why others have to put people down (because they feel badly about themselves)

I want to be the kind of person people like to come around.

 

I am always so negitive and always acting so depressed about everything.My mother brought it to my attention the other day, she said i am starting to act a lot like my grandmother, and she is the one i have most of my problems with.

 

I want to change so bad, but have no clue where to start. Please if anyone has advice please help.

love Qtpie87

[DN]

Try keeping score. Every time you react negatively give yourself a minus point. Positive behaviour merits a plus. At the end of every day, or week, tally up the score. A sort of self-imposed behaviour modification programme. Every time you start to react negatively, it will pop into your mind that you are about to lose a point.

 

Give yourself a small reward when you have more pluses than minuses

[providentielle]

Changing your behaviour is not easy but recognising what you dislike and deciding you want to change it is the first step. I am a childcare and education worker and I know that with children it takes 2 weeks to change behaviour and i guess it would be similar with adults. Trying to avoid people who bring out your negative behaviour may help and so might asking people who you like or admire to point out when you are behaving in a way that you are unhappy with. If you want to understand why you act the way you do and the reasons why certain people make you act in certain ways I can reccomend an amazing book called I'm ok, you're ok by Thomas A. Harris. Good luck

[jaiva]

I used to be like you, "Upset at the world," and making sure everyone knew it. What I did to improve my mood and attitude is I found a friend who I could talk to and tell everything that ever bothered me in life from the first thing that I could ever remember to the present. That person listened and helped me reason out the situations that bothered me and caused me to be angry even if I didn't know that it bothered me before I talked about it.

 

You have so many emotions bottled up in side and it's hurting you. You have to talk about all of those things even the things that you never wanted to remember or even think about trying to verbalize. You should write down those things that you can't say.

 

I'm willing to try to help you if you allow me to. I'm pretty good at reasoning and understanding.

 

Hope I helped/can help!

 

Jaiva

[MyNinja]

i suggest you think really hard about your past and what you've experienced as child. where you abused in any way? treated unfairly? where you put dowm alot by your parents or anyone of that matter?

 

usually our minds never forgets these things even though we seem perfectly normal in anyway, but subconsciously it kills you and it needs to escape some way. it's like keeping a secret that you know if told would cause tremendous trouble, but you hold out from telling this secret and guilt builds up, but you do everythinig possible to keep from cracking! anger begings to build inside you and you get fustrated and annoyed at everything because of this guilt.......long story short, you mind may be releasing hurt and anger from a troubled past and they way it's being expressed is like having an "attitude problem"....think long and hard about your past......also put into consideration that maybe you're going through the teenage rebellion stage and your hormones are at full throttle...good luck

[Teffany]

First of all I would like to say that it is very important when people admit they have problems. To be honest with you...your admission shows that you are "not" a bad a person at all. What happens is people around you bring you down & this is where your low self-esteem is coming from. Usually, people with low self-esteem intend to bring others down and hurt others feelings. I come to the conclusion, that your bad behavior isn't only your problem but as well as your family problems because they are the ones who hurt your feelings constantly. Perhaps they don't even notice that the're doing damage to you. I trully believe you should talk to your family and tell them how you feel othewise they won't know you're hurt. Maybe you all should look for professional help "therapy".

 

Good luck.