He cheated ages ago, I just can't forget it...

[Seraphim]

I have PTSD because my mom stayed to "do it for the kids ." No thanks. I would much rather be mentally well then to suffer like this for the rest of my life .

[kar1106]

Thank you everyone. You all gave me a lot to think about in a way I had never thought of. Thank you.

[Salty]

You are both abusing eachother. If you can't forgive him let him go it's cruel to keep punishing someone for a mistake like that!!! Let him go!!!!

[Unreasonable]

He got the gun out to emotionally blackmail you to shut up about the cheating. He didn't pull the trigger and I highly doubt he ever would.

 

But really, you DO need to get over it, or you need to leave. If you haven't gone to counselling together, I think you should. If you are going to stay, that implies forgiveness, so you can't keep holding this over his head.

[nutbrownhare]

Lol powerful? No. Mom and dad getting drunk? Lol I rarely drink. So cool it.

My kids never witness any of this, we don't fight or call each other names in front of them.

 

Believe me, your kids know - even if they don't witness it directly. My mother was convinced that my siblings and I had no inkling that she and my father fought. Bless.

 

It's just part of a delusion that parents come up with to make an unbearable situation manageable; the psychological term is "Denial".

[spinderella]

Just please answer my question, am I crazy for not getting over this decade old infidelity?

 

I think its crazy to think being stuck on cheating is the problem here and not that this guy is obviously mentally instable. Doesn't sound like any relationship should be his top priority right now....

 

And if I was his girlfriend I'd be trying to find him some help.