littleel672 Posted January 15, 2017 Share Posted January 15, 2017 So after being engaged to my ex and owning a house, it came out that he had in fact cheated because he gave me an STI. He begged me to stay to work though it, claimed he would commit suicide and said it was a one night stand only. Then not long after, a series of slanderous letters were sent to me in my home. I later found out that he'd been visiting a house in an area near his work a few times. He had pushed trying to work through it and maintained he had no idea who sent these letters, and the house was 'just a mate'. But wouldn't drive me there, muddled his story. As we were supposedly working through it he then started visiting another address near work (I learnt this all through phone tracking). He kept lying about his whereabouts. He then turned from wanting to stay with me to being hot and cold. Until finally, I managed to gain the strength to break up with him. He stayed in the house until I found a girl on his phone who had been calling him late at night. The admin girl in his office. I chucked him out. He let me cancel the wedding on my own and sort most of the house sale (he bought me out), would flit between trying to demand my attention to acting cold when I didn't give it to him - setting up new FB profiles and not blocking me etc. Always maintained this girl on his phone was a friend. However I've now found out 9 months after ending, 5 months after completing all of the house sale and being embroiled in the crap above, he is dating her. I broke NC and went mental at him - once again he was callous telling me he wished me well in a sarcastic tone. Then when I asked for the truth about the letters he put the phone down on me. I proceeded to text him to say having received this information it had filled in SO many gaps and that I knew he was lying, and that was all I needed. Asked him to block my number so he could get on with refusing to acknowledge I exist. He wouldn't block me - until a further 24 hours later when I kicked off and said some nasty things. Only then did he do it. He claimed this girl knows everything that happened - but she hasn't met friends and family. So there is another poor sucker out there believing his every word and the cycle begins again. I'm absolutely 100% aware I've been dating a complete narcissist. No doubts about it. But guys please - can someone tell me, when does this stop hurting? Why do I feel like I'm the one losing out when I wouldn't choose to touch him with a barge pole?! It just feels like karma won't arrive quickly enough to smack him in the face - he's there with another woman already massaging his ego, when I'm here single and taking the hard and long route out of our relationship?! If anyone has any advice on how to block out thinking about this, or whether they've got some good news karma stories on how this sort of thing goes wrong, I'd be most delighted to hear it. The above is only a short version of what he did so hopefully you can follow. He ignores everything I send because he knows if he says anything he gets caught up in more lies. But likewise, he then won't block any of my contact. He only ever puts the phone down on me when I quiz too hard on what he is lying about because I'm too close to the bone. Likewise - he has a habit of crying or blowing up when I've brought it up in the past to avoid the topic. I really want to move past all of this now. I rationally can see he's not good for me at all. But I still just feel torn up about everything - like they're there laughing at my expense. Link to comment
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