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Me and my then boyfriend broke up 6 months ago after 2 years.. He said he just didn't love me how he should, I however love him to bits and can't imagine life without him, anyway neither of us can afford to move out at present so we're still living together, we have regular sex under the agreement that it's just sex and a way of clearing the pipes kinda thing, I'd have honestly agreed to anything in order to keep him around, anyway few weeks ago he starts talking to this girl he says he wants to meet her but doesn't want anything serious as she has children a commitment he's not ready for, anyway he met her yesterday they had sex, I know because he text me because he thinks we've an arrangement and I'm fine with all this but I've never felt so crap I cried all day yesterday and he's going to be home soon and I don't know if I can deal with the details of what's gone on, I'm an idiot!

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Google Breakup Recovery Guide and heed the advice. Make your number one priority YOU because your self esteem will be damaged by this the longer you're in that environment. It's just the nature of rejection. You're not capable of thinking straight at the moment. You need to make it a priority to leave asap. Find an apartment that needs a roommate. Live with friends/family. Go into a little bit of debt if you need to. Just leave and stop contact with him.


Also, whether or not you realize it, he's being very selfish and is getting everything in his favour right now. Let him feel the reality of his actions (breaking up with you) by not engaging with him anymore beyond short, practical detail exchanges. For your own health, don't cuddle/kiss/sleep with him. Don't even hug. Take time away from him to heal yourself.

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Also, why don't you kick HIM out of the apartment? He's the one who left you, so he should leave the situation. Then get a roommate, if your situation permits it. If he cares about you, he'll try to ease the transition by helping you pay for his portion of last month's/transition month's rent. Especially since he's been getting 6 months of subsidized living expenses while not having to act as your boyfriend. Put your foot down, focus on yourself, spend time on things that make you happy and don't entertain any wishes/demands/thoughts/opinions or anything that come out of his mouth. Ignore him completely. You deserve better.


Word of caution - If you do this, no doubt he'll start to want you again and will start to pay more attention to you, but DON'T fall for it. It's a power game. Just move on.

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I'm sorry but he's not using you. You're willingly consenting to sleep with him, and offering him all the benefits of a relationship despite knowing the relationship is over. You're not only placing yourself at his mercy, you're presenting yourself as a doormat and he's running with it.


It's time to realize your self worth, and take the steps to live without him. Raising your self-esteem can do wonders.

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