I need your input

[liz1102]

Theres a girl at school who selfharms. Shes told me and shown me some of her scars and I am the only person who knows. Shes learning how to open up and we've been talking more and more recently.

 

She comes from a rough background (I'm not gunna go into it, but theres plenty for her to be dealing with) and suffers with depression. Shes got lots going on at home, and stuff at school, and ... theres just so much for one person to cope with.

 

I want to help her. I'm so glad that she can come to talk to me rather than keeping everything inside. The problem is, I just never know what to reply to her. I never know what to say.

 

... this is where you guys come in ...

 

when you talk to people about your self harming, what kind of things do you want to hear? I mean, I know theres not some magical phrase that'll make it all better... but i get to "ahh Honey come here..." hug her... and just never know what to say after that.

 

I would be really grateful for anything you can give me

 

 

 

Liz

[marolua]

Well, she is trying to have someone to know something about her. May be you should talk to her about things normal, but I do not hink that you should say her to stop self-harming. This does not work. You are not her boyfriend, if you are than things ought to be different. Good luck, there is nothing worser than having to do something for someone, when you do not know to do the right thing.

[thisisnotanexit]

that's great that you want to help. yes, please continue to be there for her! check out these sites. i think they can help you, they helped me!

 

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[Finchabald]

nothing is more comforting than to be embraced (hugged) by someone. i always feel uncomfortable takin about my self harm and am still when ppl talk to me about it. Is she seeing a doctor/counsellor? if there is a school councellor then maybe reccmend ur friend to see them. Talkin helps alot of ppl. goodluck.

[tazthespaz44]

I think its really cool that you want to help this chick. I would have to agree with Finchabald about the hugging thing. I'm a self-harmer and I think Hugs are the best medicine. The one thing that I want (personally, as a self-harmer) is a big hug and a, "Everything is going to be ok." It gives me hope, and makes me feel loved. It may not be that way for everyone. Well, I dont know what really to write......I should. I guess, Just be there for her, go out and do healthy, sober stuff, like the movies or the mall or something. Make sure that she knows that you're there for her. Encourage her to talk to her parents about it, or see a therapist or something.

I can't really think of anything else right now, I'm sorry i couldn't be of more help. AIM: abbyhilsher

[whathappensnext]

i also agree. Talking about it is hard and it helps if your there for them and don't totaly freak out. Saying its going to be ok does give hope to many myself being one of them. But when i talk to my friends and they are at a loss of words i understand but i aslo wonder what their thinking. So many to a point you should tell her what you think. Try to keep it low key though. i don't know maybe its just me you never know.

[thisisnotanexit]

yeah, just hang in there and be safe..don't cut near wrists and don't cut deep, etc.

[kiwifox42]

"liz"???? sure.....

is this who i think it is?