I don't want to talk to him anymore

[JoyieGracie]

How do you tell an ex who just started "casually" talking to you about their life and who they like after a year of no contact- That you don't want to talk to them anymore? I mean, why would ex's poor their harts out to an ex who hasn't talked to them in over a year, and think that they want to know about your new love life, when you've had a long term relationship with them for three years, that finally ended about 1 1/2 years ago? I want to be nice, but I don't care. By the way, he broke up with me, and then a year later innicated conversation again.

[BlackSheep]

How exactly is he contacting you - IM, phone, in person? If he is contacting you via IM or phone, just block him or don't answer his calls. If it is in person and you can't avoid seeing him, that's a little trickier. Maybe make excuses not to talk to him until he gets the hint.

[passions1]

He could be initiating conversation b/c he is used to your past company & the comfort zone he is used to versus with a complete stranger. Also he could have no female friends around, since guy friends may not be as comforting compared to females.

 

Have you tried distanting yourself, by not making yourself as easily accessible? Not returing his email or phone calls right away. Just do it when you can & in the right mood. Start off by responding in a day, to a few days to a week. Then he should get the hint that you're to busy to listen to his life & that the world does not revolve around him. If you need to, then just say that you "don't have as much time as you would like to for talking or to keep in touch with your schedule, hopefully you will understand this. But I do wish you the best & take care!". If he still persists & doesn't get the hint, then simply ignore him. If the guy can't respect your space, then he doesn't deserve respect.

Good luck!

[kipster]

How do you tell an ex who just started "casually" talking to you about their life and who they like after a year of no contact- That you don't want to talk to them anymore? I mean, why would ex's poor their harts out to an ex who hasn't talked to them in over a year, and think that they want to know about your new love life, when you've had a long term relationship with them for three years, that finally ended about 1 1/2 years ago? I want to be nice, but I don't care. By the way, he broke up with me, and then a year later innicated conversation again.

 

Simple...You stop picking up the phone. That action 'tells' him all he needs to know. Its not mean, but it is direct in saying we've had our season, you didn't want it and now that feeling is mutual. I wish you the best in your 'life' and in your future romantic relationships, but I no longer want to be privy to them. Case closed.

 

But that's the problem when you tell an EX (I'm not saying you have, but some people do without thinking about the ramifications) that you want to be friends. Then when the EX calls you, some folks believe its to get the call they've been waiting for (a rekindling of the relationship), but instead the EX takes you up on your offer of being a friend that they feel they can trust. I don't think you have to tell him anything, let your actions speak louder than any words.

 

Kip

[keefy1972]

Kipster is right. The answer is simple. Just either ignore his contact attempts or flat out tell him that you have no interest in discussing his love life with him. Tell him if he needs someone to just listen to it, get himself a dog.