Broke up with me out of the blue?

[Aelvidge]

It was a very short relationship only a few months! Everything was going well, he had met my family, I met his, we were spending almost every night together.

 

We had a little argument last Friday night but he asked to come over so we could talk and sort things out which was nice as he was making the effort. So we talked and resolved the argument.

 

We spent Sunday night together also. On Monday he texts me saying he is confused, so we met up to talk on the evening. He said he doesn't think we have much in common and that we aren't right for each other.

 

This is so confusing as only 24 hours before he was discussing me meeting his mum the following weekend!! We have text briefly but he doesn't have much to say.

 

During the time we were together my nan passed away and he stood by me through it all and knew how upset I was. So now he has done this it makes it 100% worse for me.

 

Any advice? Do I try and get more answers out of him or leave it be?

[mhowe]

Within a few months spending every night together is too much too soon and instead of getting to know each other and build gradually...you ride the wave of new attraction. Until it breaks and recedes and you find you have little in common to sustain a relationship.

 

Next time, slow the roll and get to know someone first.

[milly007]

I would just leave it be and don't press him for any more information/discussion. I wouldn't initiate any more communication with him. If by chance he contacts you and he wants to discuss things, then determine whether it would be in your best interests to discuss things with him. Just make sure, if he does contact you, that he isn't stringing you along. If he contacts you, he should be providing you with closure either way; whether it's to bring things to an end and explain why, or if he's hoping to make things work with you and move forward. He shouldn't be contacting you however, because he feels lonely or is just confused.

[Ms Darcy]

Too much. Too soon. Burnt out.

 

He didn't know you and you both rushed things spending so much time together. Getting to know you, he realized that he wasn't feeling as strongly as he was before - when he had you on a pedestal.

 

Advice: Don't contact him. Learn to take it slower next time.

[catfeeder]

It was a very short relationship only a few months! [...] we were spending almost every night together.

 

This is waaay too much, waaay too soon, and it's how people overdose on one another.

 

Insta-bonding is a set up for fast burnout or dependency forming that may keep the relationship in tact even while it suffocates one or the other partner.

 

I'd view men who move this quickly as propeller blades and avoid getting sucked in.

 

If you're seeking something with longevity, stick with men who are comfortable getting to know you, over t.i.m.e., and as a multi-faceted human being rather than focused primarily as a sexual being.

 

Nothing 'wrong' with sex, but it's a powerful blinder to all else--and once the spermy haze settles, reality can poke through the fantasy rather rudely. This is the stuff that often lands one partner in the cold.

 

Head high.