SaSaRai Posted January 6, 2005 Share Posted January 6, 2005 I dont know whats going on anymore.... all of the people i hang out with seem like big losers and they are starting to make me feel like im one too because i hang out with them. Its causing me to treat them bad and feel just.... i dont know it just makes me feel bad. Whenever i'm hanging out with them in public i look at them and start thinking of how big of a loser they are. They are not the roughest group in the school, they are the "in the middle" people, i dont like the hardcores becasue they are mean and druggies. But the peple im friends with have been my friends for the last 3 years and it feels strange now when I look at them and look at everyone else because everyone is a lot bigger than them and so am I. I am 6'3 185 lbs , i work out some too, and my best friend is the next biggest, hes 5'8 130 lbs.... everyone else is like 5'6 100 lbs... i really could use soem advice because I just feel completely strange about the entire thing and have low self confidence now. I mean... a big guy like me hanging out with a bunch of little shrimp? Link to comment
caramellabacix Posted January 6, 2005 Share Posted January 6, 2005 Dude.. I don't know how you meant to come off with that post but it makes you seem completely shallow. I am friends with many different people in different groups. Some are popular, some are less popular, and some are in different grades (older & younger.) I learned that it doesn't matter what you look like to other people, because what are any of them doing for you? The point of having friends is to have a good time and know you have people you can count on and trust. Are you willing to ditch your friends for guys who aren't "shrimp" and risk losing that trust? Highschool doesn't last forever, and if you feel insecure because of people that you hang out with, then maybe there is a bigger issue you should work on other than your friends. It's not their fault how they look, and if you've been friends with them for three years they obviously care about you. As long as you have people there for you, and you're having a good time with them, why does it bother you what other people think? If those "popular" boys aren't friends with you already, ditching your friends aren't going to make them see you any differently. It's only going to make you feel worse when you end up with no one. Link to comment
Caldus Posted January 6, 2005 Share Posted January 6, 2005 SaSaRai, if you don't feel comfortable hanging out with these people then just don't anymore. It's simple as that. I used to hang out with the wrong group of people during high school. I hung out with people who did drugs and alchohol but I never did them myself. I just hung out with them because I felt like at the time that they were the only group of people that seemed to accept me more than any other group at the school. I realized how stupid this was after a while and I stopped hanging out with them. Eventually I made much better friends during my senior year. Your confidence will increase when you find some new friends. However, you should not feel strange hanging out with any group of people based on their height and weight. I was always the shortest and skinniest one in any group but I didn't care. The new friends I made are great people and I still hang out with them today. Believe me, if you find the right people to hang out with then you won't be concerned about stuff like that anymore. Link to comment
Hope75 Posted January 6, 2005 Share Posted January 6, 2005 Well, I don't think your size has anything to do with it, but friends should make you feel good about yourself, and if you don't feel good when you hang out with these guys, maybe you should rethink whether or not they are truly friends. Why do they seem like big losers? Are other people making fun of them? How do they treat you? Are you just jumping on the bandwagon so you aren't called a loser? If these guys are truly your friends, you will stick by them even if others tease them for being different. People who harass and poke fun of those who are different then them are afraid of what they don't know, and dealing with thier own insecurities. If these guys treat you right and you have a good time hanging out with them, ignore what others say, and stick together. What do you care about what others who don't know you guys say? They don't know you. Link to comment
Stinkweed Posted January 6, 2005 Share Posted January 6, 2005 I completely agree with caramellabacix. I mean, dude, what's wrong with them being smaller than you? It's not their fault they're smaller than you? Besides I've seen big dudes hanging out with way smaller dudes, and I don't think it looks weird... You're just being paranoid, and it'll cost you all those friends... Link to comment
SkyFire Posted January 6, 2005 Share Posted January 6, 2005 What makes them losers? Their size? If so, you, my friend, are shallow and I cannot give you further advice. Link to comment
Emotional Posted January 6, 2005 Share Posted January 6, 2005 Duuuude thats just wrong...U are dissing on your friends who have been there for you for 3 years just to be cool. Its not right....Im sorry but if u want some advice on this then i think You may have to find out for yourself. You can have more than 3 friends tho. Just become the guy who everyone Knows..Join A sport and do some things u like to do join a club and meet people. If you feel like those guys aren't the greatest or ur getting bored with them..You need to get to know other people . What kind of hobbies...sports...Activities do you like to do? Join a team in school. Get involved!! Later dude Link to comment
shuntaro603 Posted January 6, 2005 Share Posted January 6, 2005 Wait a sec, you think they are losers because of their size?How are they losers? So they are not in any sports teams, so they are not popular, what about you? Are you one of those "popular" crowd? They are your friends, for 3 years. If you feel this way, then don't be friends with them anymore, you are not being fair for them and yourself. Stop wasting each other's time. Link to comment
Strictly4MyGrind Posted January 6, 2005 Share Posted January 6, 2005 Losers because of there size? I dnt tink so....Im pretty tall and built compared to my friends i dnt treat them any diffrent tho there my friends they cant be losers.....On person i hang around with is much shorter then me but he really rough i mean he can stick it out with the big boys size does not matter at all......its not your friends fault they are small.....If you dont like your friends i suggest you go and find some new ones that would fit your criteria...... Link to comment
Iceman26 Posted January 6, 2005 Share Posted January 6, 2005 Hell man, when I was your age I was taller and bigger than that, just remember you are only 15 and your friends will more than likely grow bigger as well. Some people grow tall early, and some dont. You should look at it the way I did, I used my size to protect smaller and weaker people from school bullies. Link to comment
SaSaRai Posted January 7, 2005 Author Share Posted January 7, 2005 i mean, its not so much size its just everyone is always like "why do you hang out with them nerds, they are so puny" and it used to not get to me but... lately it really has. Everyone is starting to call me gay, and que*r (no offense) and i just dont feel that comfortable around them any more. I used to hang out with these people who are calling me this... but I stay away from people who do drugs... thats the bottom line, i dont want involved. I can get along with anyone and I'm popular too. I just dont want to lose my friends... but i dont want this bad feelings i keep having when I'm aroudn them.... Link to comment
SaSaRai Posted January 7, 2005 Author Share Posted January 7, 2005 i am definitely not trying to be shallow... i just hate feeling bad about myself, i dont want new friends Link to comment
Iceman26 Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 I know its rough dude, but ignore what other people are saying about you. You know you aren't homosexual and that is what matters. Hang out with the people that you want to and ignore the haters, why would you care what drug users say anyways? They are the last people to be bagging on other people. Link to comment
Emotional Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 This happeneds more than you think and you are not the only one in this situation...If you ignore it and make it look like it doesnt bother you..Sooner or later the kids at ur school will find something else to talk about and stop talking about you. Link to comment
ApathyKid666 Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 Ah this wonderful topic! Bottom line- ignore the people bagging on you and you're friends. I'm can relate pretty well to you other than you're height I guess... I hang out with a crude bunch of people about middle class as highschool groups go. I'm only 5'8" (small in the reality of many guys), but I'm in the vicinity of 175 pounds, though you couldn't tell, I look maybe 140ish? I have a few big friends too one about 5'6 and 190 pounds, another guy 6'4 and 230 pounds (all muscle sadly As far as I'm concerned I could be getting more popular if I just didn't hang out with them... I'm superier in the fact that I'm more physically fit than anyone and I'm just generally more intelligent than everyone besides maybe one girl. My point is the "popular" people aren't as popular as you think. Most of them are nothing but gossipers and backstabbers, and the reality of their friendships is ofton times blackmail and those related things. I chose my friends because that's what they are - friends. Did you ever put this in your head yet? - What makes the popular kids so popular? All the druggies and middle class people usually don't like them (from around where I am anyways). I guess they aren't so popular after all huh? You shouldn't worry about what they're gonna think. And if they do make fun of you at any time... just notice how they travel in groups so they don't look like idiots when they try to do it by themselves Link to comment
SaSaRai Posted January 7, 2005 Author Share Posted January 7, 2005 yeah... thats true, and i have thought of that, and i think of how i used to be so stuck up.. i guess i just miss my old friends but they arent the same people... they have changed and think they are better than everyone else.... it bothers me. But like you said , they really arent that popular... but why does everyone think they are big shots? It would be so much easier if everyone else realized this too, but they are too blind to really see what is in these people. I dont want any problems with anyone... but people call me and my friends gay all the time and I almost had to take it to court, it got really bad where they were putting things on the internet and and sending me bad email etc. I finally fixed that with court threats and a lawsuit with the school but they still say things sometimes, and i know they talk about it a lot more.. just not when im around. I probably shoudl have said all of this in my first post. Link to comment
SkyFire Posted January 7, 2005 Share Posted January 7, 2005 Popularity.. It means nothing. I have been friends with many "popular" kids and they are some of the most boring and insecure people Ive come accross. Dude who CARES what someone says? so you're giving up on friends because of some retarded rumors? Yes, you are shallow. AND insecure. You have much to learn my friend. Link to comment
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