I may have messed it up with the Girl I like? What should I do now?

[RoboChris]

This is my first post, and i'm looking for some advice.

 

I've never had a girlfriend before in my life. I'm 20, and things feel a bit hopeless as i'm too shy to show any interest. With this girl though; I think I did, but it didn't quite work out.

 

So she showed peculiar signs of interest; I really believed she liked me back. It was quite surreal because I truthfully thought that she was going to be my first girlfriend, it seemed like that was what was going to happen, so of course I was happy.

 

I told a number of people I liked her, on sunday though she messaged me on Facebook asking me why people think she's seeing me. (I had not said anything to anyone about us 'seeing' each other). I said I had no idea and wasn't sure what to say further, she said 'you wish'. I went on to say to her I hadn't said sh** to anybody about seeing her. She then said that she didn't care, and she went on to say that 'I like it tbh'. (by the time this conversation started I was shocked thought my chance with her had been messed up by this rumour; but when she said she liked it, I thought it'd actually end up ending well) ..I was curious what she meant by 'I like it tbh', so I asked her what she liked and she said said 'being topic of conversation' and how it shows people have nothing better to do. I said 'haha, exactly' and then she sent me a wink smiley by the end of the conversation, which I'd assume was good. I showed this short conversation to a few friends to see what they thought. Everyone one of them reckoned she liked me and that she's into me. So that was two days ago.

 

Last night, my mates made me message her a wink sticker, and in the morning she sent me a sticker of a bear sleeping (Childish, I know. But I think she was trying to say she wasn't interested). I wasn't sure what to make of this though. When I finally saw her in uni today, having not seen her for a while, she completely blanked me when she was waiting at reception. I said 'hi' to her as I passed her, she just looked at me and looked away with a slightly annoyed look on her face. She didn't react at all really.

 

So now i'm convinced she doesn't like me or has lost interest, I feel like she sees me as a creep. Maybe she thinks i've been spreading these creepy rumours about us seeing each other when I haven't.

 

I've thought about plucking up the courage, walking up to her, asking her if I can speak, and just tell her: "I didn't spread these false rumours about us seeing each other, I just told a few people I like you, that's it". Even if she doesn't like me, I don't want her to think I'm some weirdo. I don't want to give up with someone I like this much. I've had very few chances at meeting someone that I like and having a chance to go out with them. Years since the last chance, so the last thing I want to is walk away without talking to her about it. What do you think?

[happyfrank]

Just let it go.

 

You already went up to her and she ignored you.

 

She wasn't into you. I don't think you should never ever mention somebody you like to friends. People will talk. So and so person can have crush on her and to get good with her will mention what you said.

[lifesatrip]

She sounds really immature to be honest. I don't think it's really a big deal that there were rumors about you being together. I don't think anyone would think you're a creep because of that, especially since you've already explained that you didn't start the rumors. If you bring it up again, I think it would be weird and make you look overly concerned/insecure. You've already acted too defensive about it in my opinion. I would back off and not initiate anything else with her since she ignored you (what the hell?) Or if you feel strongly that you want to make your feelings known, maybe send her a message playfully acknowledging that she ignored you and tell her straight out that you like her and just want to put that out there, but if she's not interested you understand and no hard feelings. (That ought to catch her off guard!) I would keep it really light, direct, and unapologetic.

 

Maybe she's different than me, but as a woman I would not be into it if a guy tried to show he liked me by sending a wink sticker online. It's too passive and indirect. If you're concerned about appearing creepy, the top things to avoid (in my opinion) are showing way too much interest or indiscriminate interest (meaning you give the impression of being head over heels despite not really knowing her well), being unable or unwilling to accept it if she's not interested/having too much invested, and being overly apologetic about your actions toward her. Please don't be apologetic. Just be respectful and willing to back off if she's not interested.