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Getting Older & What Would You Advise A Younger Self

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I have been thinking this a lot lately, how truly amazing it is to get older. I remember a time where I feared it almost, and honestly, I would never go back now. I look forward to it, I love who I am, and who I am becoming. I love the awareness of myself, of my individuality, of being comfortable in my own skin and with me completely - the positives, the negatives.


I have always been a bit more mature for my age (in large part due to some big life experiences which really affected me and forced me to grow up a lot faster) however I still wish there was a way I could go back and tell my 15, 18, 21 year old self what I know now...but also tell them just how much I don't know as well! When you are 15 you think you know everything, when you are in your 20s you start to realize you might now, and then as you get older, it is almost like you realize there is so much more you don't know then you do...but it is not at all scary.


If I could go back, I would tell myself some of the following, as well as any other teenager or younger one out there. Whether I would listen or not is another matter!:


1) No matter how bad life seems right now, I promise that there are brighter days ahead and that it will work out, there is better ahead. It may hurt now, but it is only increasing your capacity for pleasure.


2) Live in the moment, cherish each day as it comes. Don't stress and worry about the future or the past..try your hardest in the present and trust in yourself and your abilities.


3) Always let those you love, KNOW you love them. Don't leave angry, but also don't leave complacent or apathetic.


4) Live for yourself, not for him/her. There is more to your life than your boyfriend/girlfriend because as much as you love them, when you are that young it is unlikely you will be with them forever. Don't lose yourself in the process. Take your time, your whole life is ahead of you.


5) To those who are not fortunate in the dating world...relax. Work on yourself..unlike those that are losing themselves in others, you will be far ahead of them in knowing who you are. Be patient, the universe will reward when you are ready!


6) Be patient. Wait. There is no rush. That can be applied to many things.


7) Challenge yourself...don't be afraid. You are the only one who can change your life..others can affect it, but only YOU can change it. There is always a risk of failure, but that is only opportunity for growth. Do NOT let life pass you by.


8.) Keep your mind, body and spirit healthy. Always pursue knowledge, be open to other people's ideas, don't close off to other opinions just because they are different that your own. Challenge your capacity for thinking outside the box, accepting that there is no one truth..but many possibilities. Grow through art, or writing, or nature. Keep your body in motion. Move it, or lose it. Find something you love to do and pursue it. Keep it fit, and healthy and with something you truly enjoy. You don't need to compete, but set goals for yourself. You will live a longer, happier, productive life for it. For your spirit, stay positive, put kindness first and love freely. Love yourself! Find a way to soothe negative thoughts and energies and turn them into positive.


9) As much as you think you do...you do not know everything. And you probably won't realize just what the truth in that statement is until you are older.


10) Be true to yourself. Be you. You are the best person to be you, and you would not look good as anyone else. Do not compromise your values, or sacrifice who you are now, or in the future, to fit in, or be liked, or to keep a girl/guy or to win one over. It is not worth it.


That's enough for now, but I would be interested if anyone else has anything they would say to their younger versions if they could?

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Hi RayKay,

Haha! i guess i agree with every word of what u say! Thats so true abt exploration when we are young and every part of ups and downs that slowly carve, mould, nourish and nurture into what we are today, the what we are, and a better we each and everyday!

But if i were to re-live my life again, I guess NOT! Coz, i still dun like those sorrows and pains of growing up that i had. And if to relive u know change my life for better, also No!.. i have a motto in life and that is to live life with no regrets..


Thanks for reading..

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What would I say to my younger self? Don't be afraid to take chances; and,

Most of all, realize how good you look and how good you feel because these things don't last. I always compared myself to the media types of beauty and thought I was short and ugly. Only in my late 30s do I realize what a pretty pettit redhead I was and the effect I had on men. My youthful beauty is long gone but replaced with a bit of wisdom, peace and higher appreciation of self. With wrinkles and grey hair creeping in, I now accept myself as an attractive woman (at least to me). Imagine if I possesed this selfesteem and sense of worth as a young girl?

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I guess its like many things in life, u cant truly appreciate some things til there over. In this case when u get older u realise that u didnt appreciate your younger days enough. Its like this for many things in life. Thats why i always try to appreciate things in my life, but im still all

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Being 45.. i feel like the grandpa of the forum at times.. if i could go back and tell my younger self something if would at least include the following:


1) DO be afraid to take chances. NO risks in life makes a boring life.


2) Believe in yourself if you expect others to..


3) Live your life for YOU, not for others. Others really dont give a damn. Even in marriage live your own life. Never give up WHO YOU ARE!


4) those older than you really dont want you making the same mistakes they did.. LIsten!


5) Dont be afriad to show your emotions... Never miss an opportunity to tell some you care.


6) Follow your heart sometimes ... your head is too logical sometimes...

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Things I would tell my younger self:


1. Stop being so afraid of other people. Life sucks when you're afraid.

2. Turn off the damn TV and get some exercise.

3. Learn to eat healthy.

4. Go and talk to that girl you like because she's not going to talk to you.

5. The books they force you to read in high school may suck, but there are some that are actually worth reading.

6. Don't go to technical college.

7. Don't be afraid to spend your savings. You're young, use it to have some fun. Go on a trip, buy some new clothes.


I can probably think of more, but that should be enough to set the young me straight.

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don't listen to my parents and make up my own stupid mind!


^^: What I regret the most right now if giving up on music because my parents told me to. I would have loved to be a professional pianist and I was soooo close that when I gave up my piano teacher flipped out on me and went to my friends' moms and told them "tea is insane! she's quitting piano! someone talk to her!" ... well... yeah, now that I think about it, that was pretty insane! UGH! I should have continued. I got into music schools and all and I got some scholarships with music... and my dad said he doesn't want a music major daughter. bleh.

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  • 2 weeks later...

To my younger self I would advise:


- It's unnecessary and futile to try to please everyone (including immediate family)

- All advice given by your elders cannot apply to your particular situation: use your head!

- Seize the moments which bring you self gratification. But not at the expense of other peoples misery.

- A place called "Utopia" does not exist.

- Keep it real, keep it simple.

- You are the one and only... keep that in mind.

- Develop self reliance and resourcefulness.

- Education is great; but you won't be needing %90 of what you've learned in life.

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- Don't always regret past mistakes because you've learnt from them and changed for the better

- Always be yourself! Conformity sucks!

- Follow your heart and gut feelings

- Don't buy yourself cheap rubbish when you could pamper yourself with something speacial

- When your careers counsellor asked you what you wanted to be don't say what you thought your Dad wanted you to be because you didn't know what you really wanted.. take sometime to think about it

- Learn to love yourself and don't expect anyone else to be as sweet and loving as you are

- Take better care of your body, skin, teeth etc..

- Live for today instead of worrying about tomorrow

- Be proud of yourself when you know you've accomplished something

- Instead of thinking of what you don't have be grateful for what you do have

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ITA.I like who I am now and wouldn't want to go back for any reason.Being a teen was so hard,then rasing a son and being a "Mom" was also tough.Now my life is giving me time for concentrating on myself and whats good for me.If I could talk to my younger self I'd say ,"relax it gets better."

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