Competition!

[BayAreaBabe86]

Is it wise to wait for the "right time" to tell someone you like them when there are tons of other people dying for the chance to be with that person too? Or should I hurry and say something before one of the other leeches sucks him in first? All the signs of him being interested in me are there, and I definetly have an interest in him, however there are girls that he has known longer than me that I know like him and want to get with him.. Competition is on and heavy... I want to know if theres still a shot even though he talks to other girls and flirts, but flirts with me in a different way then he does with the other girls..... what should I do?

[DBL]

Your 18, not 12...you shouldn't be looking at this as competition. If you have to compete, then to me it is not worth it. If you know he likes you then go for it.

 

DBL

[ticklebug]

ok I have to laugh at your post a bit here...calling other women leeches. Being a tad territorial of someone you don't even know for sure returns the same feelings you have don't you think?

 

I'm wondering what you mean by waiting for the "right time"...if you are concerned someone might suck him up beofre you get there...don't you think you have already hit that "right time"?

 

btw - I suggest you consider not treating this guy like he belongs on a pedestal to be worshiped or something...consider yourself the catch...and that if he chooses to not return your affections that it is HIS loss, not yours...

[striderhiryu81]

Yeah, why not go for broke? I know you have feelings for him and all but wouldn't you rather just put it out there and see what he says? If you wait for the right moment, it may be too late. Then what would you do?

 

Not to be negative but please remember that if he says that hes not interested in that way or something like that, then that isn't anything to be discouraged over...he never really was "yours" to begin with.

 

But seriously, if you say the signs are there, then what would it hurt to say something? Actually, you might not even need to do that...women are usually the ones that give the signals...guys are usually the ones that act on them. Be friendly and fllirty with him, he should get the picture. Maybe grab his arm (bicep or something...NOT his hand...may be too familiar) when you are walking together.And don't forget to smile and look him in the eye. Sometimes the 3-4 second stare and then coy look away lets someone know that you are interested in THAT way. I don't know if you guys are just friends or what... and he probably doesnt either...so try to be a little more clear with your flirting. Girls are always flirting with me at school but they aren't really interested..its just for fun. I either know they have boyfriends or I can just tell...no real "i'm into you" signals , just girls trying to look cute. You have to give those "real" signals off or else he might not want to risk making a false move.

 

Sorry for babblling. If this post is probably more confusing than helpful then contact me or maybe someone else can take a shot at explaining it a little better than I did... to sum it up GO FOR IT! Just lay off the "I love you"'s.

[Desired1]

Leeches. WOW thats drastic. Hmmm... Well, if he treats you differently from other girls then he may like you, but he might also be trying to play games with you. Personally, I don't like games and don't appreciate someone who would treat me as if I am able to be sacrificed. But that's just me. To each his/er own.

[San123]

Is this guy the same guy you have been posting about? I seem to remember the same sort of posts by you about how to tell a guy you like them etc. (I think) You are fretting over him way too much! Just tell him!!! If not, 2 months from now you're going to be in the same situation!!

[RayKay]

Hmm....it's probably best not to think of other women as leeches...seems sort of harsh, don't you think, to call them so simply as they may be interested?

 

Anyway, don't put the guy on a pedestal, you are thinking way too much about this (I have seen your other posts too). Ask him out to go out/hang out with him more, etc. People fall for people over time....you can't expect him to be head over heels and show you his everlasting devotion this early on...so you are going to just have to take a chance and hope he has enough interest to maybe see where it can go. But don't wrap so much into him this soon.

[Mun]

I don't agree with you telling him how you feel. I do think you should show him just by flirting back and playing along with him. If he likes you he will ask you out ...plain and simple. If he is not that interested then he won't.

 

He sounds like he is not shy at all so he doesn't need much help there. He is probably one of these guys who goes after what he wants. He doesn't seem to be afraid of women.

 

What's wrong with having a little more confidence in yourself and being a tad bit more patient?

 

If one of those othere girs asks him out he may go out with them, but it's the girl he has to chase himself that he will be more interested in---well that's how I usually see things happen.

[Day_Walker]

I dont believe in competition, if you feel that you have to compete for another persons affection, then your not putting yourself in a favorable situation. I would argue that the person doesnt like you that much, since there is this outside stimulus that keeps getting his attention. If you really think he flirts with you different then have some self control and let the "leeches" fight over him.

[Mun]

This actually reminds me of a situation I was in.

 

I was dating a guy and he had several female friends. At one point we were on a date when one of them called his cell --she knew we were out together . She later messaged me on aim to let me know she was not jealous that he had taken me out.

 

Then while we were on another date he told me that there had been some angry words back and forth between a girl he had dated and this same friend... and guess what.. while they were bickering over him---he had asked ME out . Why? because I refused to be part of all the drama that was going on.

 

I held on to my dignity and he treated me with respect.

[broadshoulders]

show him how you feel. dont tell but show him how you feel. when your with him make sure you flirt, its your territory as a woman. dangle the carrot in front of him until he's where you want him. if he starts warming up to you then you can tell him. get to know him, there's no short cut in life.