Coffee

[Moo123]

Hi,

 

I recently had an operation on my arm and my doctor assisted me greatly both in terms of timing, which assisted me greatly. Also, went out of his way to make sure the best surgeon did the operation (fastening the process)- as a thank you, I wrote him a thank u note and said that if that if he ever needed advice in my line of work or general chat over coffee, to not hesitate to ask.

 

In my line of work, I am always offering advice to people (whether in my realm or can assist clients by knowing others who can help). I think I'm being a bit paranoid, but was wondering whether he would get the wrong impression? Whether he thinks I am hitting on him? I'm due to see him soon and just wanted to know ur thoughts.

 

Thanks u,

 

M

[annie24]

are you in a generally useful line of work? or do you do something that is so specialized that he would likely not need to consult you? I think it's a nice gesture and I don't think you should worry. people give little gifts for their doctors all the time.

[HeatherB]

He's a medical professional, so he's trained to overlook flirty subtexts. Don't worry about it. Just be yourself and your friendly intentions will be obvious.

[alli]

That type of thing is something that can be taken either way, depending on your behavior and the surrounding circumstances. If you acted flirty and repeatedly offered to get together for coffee or drinks, then yes it would probably be taken "that" way.

 

Considering what he did for you finding you the best surgeon, that you wrote him a thank you note & offered your expertise in your job, I think he probably knows you are just grateful for what he did for you.

[Dragunov-21]

Is coo'

 

Don't stress.

[Moo123]

Thank you everyone for all ur advice - I really appreciate you all taking the time.

[Moo123]

That type of thing is something that can be taken either way, depending on your behavior and the surrounding circumstances. If you acted flirty and repeatedly offered to get together for coffee or drinks, then yes it would probably be taken "that" way.

 

Considering what he did for you finding you the best surgeon, that you wrote him a thank you note & offered your expertise in your job, I think he probably knows you are just grateful for what he did for you.

 

Thank you everyone for all ur advice - I really appreciate you all taking the time.

 

In case you were wondering, my friend who I took with me for moral support says that he was flirting with me (winking, acting super nervous, staring at me). Although, I didn't see it - call me blind. I acted professional, didn't stare or joke with him. I was genuinely just super grateful, especially as he did a good job in referring me etc. I didn't have chance to thank him after op but left a quick handwritten note to his secretary. It was only after full recovery and phydio that I thanked him properly with a card, as I felt I was being considerate. Although, he dosent know it - he saved me my job.

[leki lata]

Oh dear, if he was 'flirting' with you then that is not right. It is very common for a patient to become attracted to her doctor - and vice versa- but you must keep in mind that there needs to be a purely professional relationship between any doctor and his/her patient. Please do not go down the road of encouraging him. A simple thank you card for his help was a considerate gesture on your part, but please do not consider breaching the boundary that should remain between a doctor and his/her patient. Such boundaries are there for a very good reason ; to protect the patient-doctor relationship.

[Moo123]

Oh dear, if he was 'flirting' with you then that is not right. It is very common for a patient to become attracted to her doctor - and vice versa- but you must keep in mind that there needs to be a purely professional relationship between any doctor and his/her patient. Please do not go down the road of encouraging him. A simple thank you card for his help was a considerate gesture on your part, but please do not consider breaching the boundary that should remain between a doctor and his/her patient. Such boundaries are there for a very good reason ; to protect the patient-doctor relationship.

 

Hi, thank you. I definitely won't. Being in a profession where I too need to maintain professional relationships and not cross boundary - I would never do that. I personally didn't see him flirting - I think if he was he was unprofessional he would have used my card as an opportunity. I just was worried of giving him the wrong impression and my friend making the card into something that it is not and making me feel awkward! Hence thinking that if did give him wrong impression I was considering asking for another doctor....but I honestly didn't do anything in terms of my actions - apart from compliment him for the work he did for me.

[HeatherB]

See, you're just a sweet person who gives back and shows your appreciation, Moo. Stay that way and don't let any worries ever stop you. When you follow your natural inclination to show your gratitude, you make other people's days. You make it easier for them to keep giving too. It's a truly beautiful thing.

 

A few people might be so starved for positive strokes that they might misunderstand. Just comes with the territory. Everyone is drawn to light and warmth.