Would you consider this cheating

[titan]

Hi guys i just wanted you opinion if you consider this cheating. My Ex-girlfriend was at a club and dancing in a group of friends, closely with a male friend of a friend. Anyway she goes to the bath room and the guy follows her and when she comes out they talk for a while exchange numbers and he kisses her i assume she knew it was coming.

My Ex- then pulls away saying she has a boyfriend(me), the guys still calls the next day and she says she wants nothing to with him.

 

The reason i ask is because she wants to get back together, but of course i have my doubts.

 

Is this cheating or am i over-reacting?? i also think the exchanging of numbers is funny.

 

Is it Forgivable.

[ReadyorNot]

I would be pissed if my bf was dancing with a chick... whether its a friend of a friend or not... but its something I guess I would get over.. its not the end of the world right??

 

She shouldnt have exchanged numbers only cause it was giving him the wrong idea.... but she was right to pull away and tell him she had a bf...

 

You cant really ask someone else if it is forgiveable.. you can only do what you feel is right...

 

If it were me, I would be steaming for a few days(maybe not even want to see my bf) but then I would miss my bf and get over it..

 

Im sure thats just me since I am trying to deal with maybe losing my bf...

[titan]

interesting read on the situation. I was thinking she was thinking it was a good idea at the time at then when push came to shove she bailed.

 

But the damage had been done.

[San123]

I don't really know... at least she pulled away?

[mahlina]

She didn't really have to give out her number...If I were in her shoes, I would've not given my number out to a guy who I don't like. Maybe she did it to get you jealous? If that's the case, then that's not cool either. Whatever it is, she doesn't seem to be interested in him anyway. Looks like he wants something, she knows it, but isn't taking him seriously. Doesn't sound like something that I'd worry about. If she did like him, then she wouldn't feel the need to tell you about him.

[titan]

Hrmm i never looked at it that way. come to think of it she always got angry that i never got jealous during the relationship.

 

Thanks for the replies guys.

[DBL]

Did you actually see her pull away? If you didn't...the scenario don't sound right then. If she was not interested they would not be exchanging numbers. I'm thinking if she pulled away from the kiss, she is probably just trying to get away with a half lie.

 

Cheating depends on the person...some people don't think kissing is cheating, where others think it is. Me personally...I would kick her to the curb, I'd fine someone that doesn't lead guys on while she has a boyfriend.

 

DBL

[titan]

my dilema exactly thats what i think. Although she could have thought it was a good idea in her head but when it actually happened paniced and knew what went wrong.

[DBL]

I don't know or I don't remember what the deal in your relationship is. If she was trying to get back with you and you are holding out, then she may just be backing herself up with this guy in case you bail.

 

However still....I don't have the time and patience to play them games.

 

DBL

[mahlina]

The thing that I don't get is, why would he kiss her? Whenever I dance with someone at a club, and if they're going to touch me disrespectfully like groaping me, or trying to touch me in any other way, I say, "Excuse me. Please don't do that." OR, I immediately remove their hand away from me. And, if the guy has a problem with it, then he can go jack off.

 

I've been in situations in which guys at clubs do try to get away with these things, but I first of all, don't get myself into that predicament, by #1: preventing things like that from happening in the first place, and #2: not giving a creep my number. Honestly, I like to go there once in a while for the sake of dancing, not to pick up guys. I can't trust guys at clubs. Some people can, but I can't. So, either she's probably okay with meeting people at clubs, or she doesn't have the willpower to say no? But even then, why give her # out? She could've easily said that she has a boyfriend (even if she doesn't). Maybe she feels the need to have someone there as a backup? Maybe she feels a bit insecure about not having a boyfriend, so she needs that kind of attention? I don't know.

 

Whatever it is, if you can look past this situation, then communicate about how you feel with her. Maybe she was trying to get revenge in some odd way. If she's what you want, then talk to her. But, if something like this bothers you this much, then maybe it's time to move on. Relationships build on trust, so either way, it's really up to the both of you if you really want to work it out or not. But her giving her number out just seems kinda fishy. She should tell him to get lost, if she doesn't like him, or tell him that she's back with her man, so that he can back off.

[DBL]

I agree with Mahlina...she should not have gotten herself in this predicament.

 

DBL

[titan]

i agree, as stated before previously i never got jealous when she mentioned a guy was interested, i was like if you want to date him go ahead. She later told me that she hated that and was upset that i never got jealous but i had total trust. I believe it was done just to let me know guys find her attractive which i knew but maybe she read me wrong with giving her total trust. she took it as i was saying she is a piece os S..t and no one else would want her.

[Cecelius]

She has some young girl issues. I have heard a million stories about girls acting skanky or shady in an effort to make people jealous: in the end it just makes them look skanky or shady.

 

I'd dump her. I don't know what your line about dancing close is, but the kiss she should have known was coming (unless she's under 25) and the phone number is the deal breaker.

[titan]

yeah the phone number is my major worry, i mean some guys at clubs can be very pushy, but the phone number was intended for future interest.

[Iceman26]

In your post you said she was your ex........was she your ex at that time she kissed this other guy? Because if thats true, it couldn't be cheating because you werent technically with her. However, if she was with you at the time and kissed this guy I wouldnt see her anymore.

 

Did this "friend of a friend" know that you guys were dating? Because if he did know you were dating her, and he knows you, I would knock some teeth in. Nobody likes a backstabbing penis blocker.

[titan]

No we were dating, it is the reason she is my ex and a few other things. She ended it because she couldn't deal with her guilt.

 

We have been broken up for about 4 months and she recently said she wants to get back together.

 

My thinking it was just a kiss at a club and i know how some guys can be, but the number exchanging still is a worry.

 

And no i didn't know this guy it was a friend of one of ex girlfriends work mates.

[Cecelius]

Honestly, if you're bored, take her back as something to do. Tell her that you need to take it slow for a while to get back into things, or some nonsense like that.

 

But I never get emotionally attached (or exclusive) with her; she doesn't sound worth it.