Is he starting to view me as a booty call?

[bebeblondie]

Not sure if I'm making a big deal out of nothing but here it goes:

 

Been seeing this guy for almost 2 months, we usually see each other every weekend, we've been sexually intimate. Last week there was a tragedy in his immediate family, so I did not hear from that much, and then Friday night he called me and told me all the details of the tragedy (which were pretty bad, and I won't get into them on here). We were on the phone for about an hour and a half, and I think by the end of the conversation he seemed to cheer up a bit. There was no mention of seeing me that weekend, and I understood given what had happened, so Saturday we were talking thru text and he said he was on his way to see his sister in the hopsital (referring to the tradedy), which is in my town. He then insinuated that he would maybe come by afterward, I told him I had made plans to go dinner with my cousin but would probably be home by 10pm if he was still around, he said ok. I ended up leaving dinner close to 10:30pm and I told him I was on my way home, he said he was already back home because he had to get up early and pick up his nephew (the son of the sister who was in the hopital), so I said ok and told him to come by Sunday since he was going to be in town again for Easter dinner (his family lives in my town), he said definitely. So Sunday night he came over around 7pm, we watched tv and chatted...and then around 7:30 he was already trying to get it on with me. Now he's never made me feel like a booty call until now, he always takes me out, he is contact with me almost everyday, and since we were set up by mutual friends he's always asking them to come out with us. He did end up staying the whole night and he was very affectionate to me after sex (as he always is), but im not sure if thats because he has feelings for me, or that's just the way he is.

 

So I guess my question is, do you guys think he's starting to view me as a booty call? Or should I just chalk up his behavior Sunday to a rough week?

[mhowe]

How the heck do you get to "booty call" from that behavior?

 

He didn't "stop by" the night you had plans, he was in town due to holiday and sister's tragedy....you had sex, he stayed the nite and was affectionate....

 

Because he didn't take you out?

[metrogirl]

I'm not sure I understand why you feel that you are a booty call? He hasn't done anything differently has he?

[bebeblondie]

I can understand the not taking me out that night given the circumstances and that it was Easter Sunday. I was just a bit put off that he walked through my door at 7pm, and by 7:30 he was already trying to have sex with me...I don't know maybe that's normal, but I just thought that was a bit rushed. But I admit I might be making a big deal out of nothing.

[becomingkate]

I have always found that when my SO's were dealing with something tragic, making love is a way for them to feel alive and normal, a way to lighten up the terrible feelings they might be having. I wouldn't say he was using you as a booty call. It sounds like he needed to be with you.

[mhowe]

Have no idea if this is relevant or not --- but for some men, a big family stress thing makes them crave intimacy. After my bf mom died --- he came to tell me and in short order he wanted to head to the bedroom. It is more an affirmation of love/connection then "sex" for the sake of sex.

 

Take it as a compliment...not as a booty call.

[metrogirl]

Have no idea if this is relevant or not --- but for some men, a big family stress thing makes them crave intimacy. After my bf mom died --- he came to tell me and in short order he wanted to head to the bedroom. It is more an affirmation of love/connection then "sex" for the sake of sex.

 

Take it as a compliment...not as a booty call.

 

Same thing happened with my the boyfriend. When his father died, the only thing he wanted to do was have sex. I thought it was the most bizarre thing but the closeness of us made him feel better.

[bebeblondie]

I have always found that when my SO's were dealing with something tragic, making love is a way for them to feel alive and normal, a way to lighten up the terrible feelings they might be having. I wouldn't say he was using you as a booty call. It sounds like he needed to be with you.

 

Ok I suspected that might've been it, I just didn't know because I've really never been with anyone while they experienced something tragic. But this makes sense

[becomingkate]

Yes, same with me. When my HS boyfriend's brother died, he wanted to make love right after finding out. I was surprised, but then again we were pretty young. I've since learned that this is normal behaviour.

[mhowe]

Yes, same with me. When my HS boyfriend's brother died, he wanted to make love right after finding out. I was surprised, but then again we were pretty young. I've since learned that this is normal behaviour.

 

....for men! I understand it, but don't necessarily "get it"!!!!

[regular joe]

I have always found that when my SO's were dealing with something tragic, making love is a way for them to feel alive and normal, a way to lighten up the terrible feelings they might be having. I wouldn't say he was using you as a booty call. It sounds like he needed to be with you.

 

FROM A GUYS VIEW POINT:

 

Couldn't have said it any better myself. As a matter of fact just the opposite. I get like this when dealing with tragedy/ grief. You want that warm, cozy, loving feeling that only being intimate can give you to escape from reality for a little while. If anything take it as a compliment, he feels close to you. As a guy I will tell you it doesn't really work with a "booty call" you don't have the closeness. You don't get the same comforting effect as you do with someone you care about. At least that's how it is for me. It would actually be even more work to visit a "booty call" and even you would still want to leave and be alone afterwards.

[surfjon]

When I'm going thru emotional crisis or actually when I'm sick, I crave sex....odd I know, but true.

 

You're a booty call if he never takes you anywhere except the bedroom....