bebeblondie Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 So here's a little update for those of you following my situation: Let me just start by saying, it's totally over between me and this guy but I just though some of you might get a kick out of this... So I have not heard from him since that phone conversation we had Wednesday night. Friday night my friend's husband who had set us up, spoke to him and when they got on the topic of me, the guy said that it is obvious that I don't want to be bothered with him, since I told him during our last conversation that I would call him when I got out of school and I never did (I never said I'd call him, he asked me what time I was getting out, I said around 9, his response was "well I might still be up" and that was it). He also said that I haven't contacted him since our last conversation so that shows im not interested, since we had that whole conversation about improving communication (he hasn't contacted me either). But the best part was, that he told them I am obviously not looking for anything (meanwhile he's the one who said to keept it "light and airy" and I thought I was doing just that). Anyhow this just confirms to me that I made the right decision about him, all he does is play the blame game and that's not somebody I want to date. The classy thing for him to have said to my friend's husband would've been "it just didn't work out" and leave it at that. I guess this guy has a hard time taking responsibility for his actions. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 I wouldn't draw any more conclusions than that your friend shared a conversation you are hearing second-hand about someone you didn't know well and therefore I wouldn't put too much stock in it and certainly not form any conclusions about who he is as a person. None of this information has any relevance to your decision or whether you made the right decision - I say forge ahead and don't indulge in being derailed by gossip. Maybe ask the mutual friend not to mention this person anymore. Link to comment
Cherry009 Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 Haha i think you and me have the same luck! I dated a guy similar to this once, he became flakey and began cancelling plans etc and then when confronted he tried to turn it around on me, playing the blame game! You are so better off without that loser. He sounds so immature and like someone who expects everything to just fall into his lap without him having to make one ounce of effort! Link to comment
bebeblondie Posted March 17, 2013 Author Share Posted March 17, 2013 Haha i think you and me have the same luck! I dated a guy similar to this once, he became flakey and began cancelling plans etc and then when confronted he tried to turn it around on me, playing the blame game! You are so better off without that loser. He sounds so immature and like someone who expects everything to just fall into his lap without him having to make one ounce of effort! Yea I think he's a good guy but he just has a lot of growing up to do, and some insecurity issues (which I sensed while we were seeing each other). Link to comment
kittykitty Posted March 18, 2013 Share Posted March 18, 2013 I've been following your threads and I think it was the right thing to do ending it. There was obviously something there in your gut that you knew that this wasn't the guy for you. HOWEVER, as far as the communication goes in general- if a guy I was seeing was distant to me in his communication as you were with this guy - I would also assume he didn't want anything and I would move on. When both parties sit back and wait for the other person to be making the first move it just can't work because you both assume the other isn't interested or they would be texting or calling. "Light and airy" doesn't necessarily mean no commitment and he could have genuinely been waiting for your call. By not calling when you said you may or not sending a text saying sorry you didn't have time to call you were clearly showing him that you weren't interested. It's like being stood up, especially after the amount of dates that you went on with him. So it's hard to turn this around when he told your friend that you clearly weren't interested - because you weren't. Link to comment
bebeblondie Posted March 18, 2013 Author Share Posted March 18, 2013 I've been following your threads and I think it was the right thing to do ending it. There was obviously something there in your gut that you knew that this wasn't the guy for you. By not calling when you said you may or not sending a text saying sorry you didn't have time to call you were clearly showing him that you weren't interested. It's like being stood up, especially after the amount of dates that you went on with him. So it's hard to turn this around when he told your friend that you clearly weren't interested - because you weren't. That's the thing I never said I'd call him, there was no mention of me calling or texting him when I got out of school that night. He might've thought it was implied but I'm not a mind reader, and I think that was one of our major issue, we both just assumed the other should know what we're thinking. Nonetheless I believe if you're truly interested you call whether or not he thought he should've heard from me first. Link to comment
kittykitty Posted March 18, 2013 Share Posted March 18, 2013 I totally get that. I just think it's funny that YOU were saying that he wasn't calling or texting you so he must not be interested. And then HE'S going to his friend and saying that you weren't calling or texting so you must not be interested. It's the whole catch 22 lol Link to comment
bebeblondie Posted March 18, 2013 Author Share Posted March 18, 2013 I totally get that. I just think it's funny that YOU were saying that he wasn't calling or texting you so he must not be interested. And then HE'S going to his friend and saying that you weren't calling or texting so you must not be interested. It's the whole catch 22 lol Lol exactly. I think we both have some insecurity issues, and so I think if we'd continued this it might have been a recipe for disaster lol. Link to comment
Cherry009 Posted March 18, 2013 Share Posted March 18, 2013 Hmmm i dont know if i agree, he should just man up and take the lead and text or call you. you told him before that you liked him, what more does he need? Anyway i guess it doesnt matter as it is over now. Link to comment
bebeblondie Posted March 18, 2013 Author Share Posted March 18, 2013 he should just man up and take the lead and text or call you. you told him before that you liked him, what more does he need? Anyway i guess it doesnt matter as it is over now. Yup that's my view of it! Link to comment
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