My friend hasnt talk to me in almost a MONTH?

[loveblindxo]

Hello, My friend and I have been really good friends on/off since about 4th grade. During high school, we had somewhat of a rough patch and after we graduated, we stopped talking for about almost a year. However, I began to miss her and would keep having dreams about her. Finally, I had enough went over to her house and we patched everything up. Since, then we've been good. We both mature and was there for one another.

 

However, last month around after her birthday, I realized she started acting more and more distant. I realized it was going on almost a week without talk to her, so I hit her up. No phone call back or text for a few days. I got worried and contacted her sister. Her sister told me she hadn't heard from her either. I told her please, let her know I was asking about her.

 

Finally, She contacted me and she said she was okay. She had phone issues, and blah. Then again,realized minimal contact, so I contacted her, she responded, had full conversation, even invited me to go walking(I couldn't do). And then that's the last I heard of her.

 

 

About the first week of February, I text her, no respond back. And i haven't heard from her since. I don't understand, I really CAN'T THINK of anything I did. I even asked her on several occasions was she mad at me and she never told me she had a problem with me. It's irritating me and I miss her. I was going to just send her a long text asking about whats going on between us and if we could please just sit down and talk. However, my other friends are saying leave her alone.

 

 

My friend though, shes a very forgiving and understand person though. What shall I DO? thanks

[Xylitol]

She's fed up with you, you are either annoying or boring, or not on the same frequency of doing what she likes,

 

My idea is that you should invite her doing something she really enjoys, and be carefull on the look out what kind of dislikes she seems to have about you, but don't speak openly about it. Try asking her other friends what she thinks about you.

[catfeeder]

I disagree with the above. Sometimes people go into a funk, and that doesn't need to be about you.

 

I'd send her an occasional text or email just to say something simple, like, "I heard xyz song and thought of you." or "Just saying hello, and I'm thinking of you." Maybe mail her a funny little card or something.

 

Not everything needs to be about a confrontation with a big outcome. Keep a light touch.

[ncoconut]

It doesn't sound like anything you did. People have their own issues and it can really alter the way they interact with people. Send an occasional text, but all you can really do is wait until she is ready to come back into the world.

[laninaperdida]

Relationships with girls are a lot like relationships with guys:

The craziest ***** wins.

She's avoiding you, that's for sure.

You either be persistent... The 1 who's there for her... Develop even more history... Whatever.

OR...

You treat her the way she's treating you: poof.

You don't need to take it all THAT personal.

Sometimes, people just need to go their own way.

This exact thing happened with me & my XBFF.

She just kinda phased me out (not that I put up much of a fight) & it hurt.

2 1st.

Saw her in the mall yesterday actually, & she said hi, but I hate to say I kinda just said hi & walked away.

I didn't invite her back into my life with open arms, but I didn't slam the door in her face, either.

She chose to leave, if she wants back she'll make an effort.

[Xylitol]

I disagree with the above. Sometimes people go into a funk, and that doesn't need to be about you.

 

I'd send her an occasional text or email just to say something simple, like, "I heard xyz song and thought of you." or "Just saying hello, and I'm thinking of you." Maybe mail her a funny little card or something.

 

Not everything needs to be about a confrontation with a big outcome. Keep a light touch.

 

I disagree with this, a funk might be a week or two but an entire month is not a funk anymore, she is rejecting you for a reason.

[laninaperdida]

I disagree with this, a funk might be a week or two but an entire month is not a funk anymore, she is rejecting you for a reason.

 

By "going their own way" I mean like a funk.

It can last years.

You won't *always* have a place in someone's life.

Think about the last person you didn't care about enough to respond back to.

Trust me, there's a few people... We all do it.

That person you see in the mall & suggests getting together later & you hope they don't actually take you up on it.

Whatever your reasons, when it happens to you the reasons are pretty transferable.

Don't take it personally.

It does suck, but do what was suggested & keep in LIGHT contact.

You don't want to chase this person (whm obviously doesn't want you around right now) like a puppy but you don't want to close the door either

[catfeeder]

I disagree with this, a funk might be a week or two but an entire month is not a funk anymore, she is rejecting you for a reason.

 

The term 'reject' is almost as hardcore as your initial response. It doesn't need to be that drastic. I've maintained friendships with people as far back as early childhood--but I did that by allowing for separate paths and some cycles of living that simply don't include one another.

 

We can choose to be offended when someone goes dark, or we can view it as permission to drop from their radar in the future when ~we~ need to focus elsewhere. People will do this from time to time. If we want to injure ourselves by perceiving 'rejection' in every period of radio silence, we can do that. It just doesn't serve anybody.

[laninaperdida]

Just wanted to add something that happened to me that may shed some new light on your situation.

I ran into an old friend the other day.

She called my name & I actually confess I tried to pretend I didn't hear her, but she called my name so loudly I had to say hi.

It was nothing personal... I just wanted to get home... Bad timing.

She made this huge fuss about how we should get together, blah, blah, blah.

I agreed, but figured it wouldn't happen.

However, she was so persistent in exchanging numbers.

I've texted her a few times since then & no response.

She may have wanted to re connect then, but that was last week, you know?

Do I take it personally?

No.

I don't really care, lol.

That's how people are sometimes... Wants change.

[LonelyRanger]

Dude, I don't mind to be mean or anything her. But, from what you have said, it sounds like you are being a bit of a cling on. I know for a fact that girls hate guys like these, as friends or partners etc. Honestly, if you try and hit her up and she doesn't respond, just leave it. Don't get all worried about it or anything because then you appear to be a irritating, weird, annoying guy. Then she tells her friends about it then they find you weird. Been there done that hahaha My advice is to try imitate a conversation like say once every week or so. If no reply, then just leave it and move on to other friends.

[Lauracs]

I dont think you should be making as much of an effort as you are. A friendship isnt one sided. Also she's maybe just busy, doesnt have much money on her phone or isnt very easy to get in touch with. I had a friend who hasnt been in touch with myself and other friends for over a year.. I used to make the effort to contact her asking her how she was doing or inviting her out and she couldnt even send a text back. Some people just arent interested. Invest your effort into someone else.