I don't know what to do but I'm afraid.

[nastrow]

I haven't made a real friend in 7 years. Right now I have exactly 1 friend, who I've had since 6th grade. I've never even held hands with a girl and I'm 20. I'm almost 2 years through college and not a single person would really care if I just left and never came back. I feel like I can get along with people, and I have made strides to become much more comfortable socially, but it doesn't really seem to matter. The worst part is having relationships with other people is one of the most important things in my life. A long time ago I realized that pretty much everything was much, much more enjoyable with someone to share it with. Every night when I go to bed I think about how amazing it would be to fall asleep with my arms around somebody who cares about me. I can only take so much of this. All I want right now is more friends and a girl, and I just can't get them. I don't know if I'll ever get them, and that terrifies me. Every day I try to improve myself: I remind myself to smile at people, say something even though I'm a little scared to, or just make sure I work out at the gym and say hi to people I know. I always tell myself "Baby steps." I want to have this solved by the time I'm 25. This is kind of dumb, but occasionally I think about what it would be like getting married to some incredible girl and having a bunch of friends there. Making a big party of it. It sounds so good, and but I'm no closer to that place than I was 10 years ago.

 

It's just, no matter what I think I'm doing right, the results stay the same. I don't think I'm depressed. I don't really think I have any big anxiety problems or disorders. As far as I can tell I'm not horrendously ugly. I'm just not sure it matters anymore.

[Forrest99]

The best things to do, in my opinion.. Is take what you're interested in (say for instance, a certain type of music, anime, fitness, sports) and join a group/society or even an online forum which is connected to that interest. Then just share your interests and experiences with those people

I'm sure you'll come to find more friends soon enough.

[Not a rookie]

Nowadays for some reason people think people need to have dozens and dozens of friends. In reality good friends are few. I did not have a boyfriend until I reached the age of 25. Some people are late bloomers. There is nothing wrong with you. You've got the right state of mind to find love. One day you will find someone very special.

Have you tried aid-climbing? It's a great way to socialize and meet some very interesting people.

[binurial]

Love comes when you're not seeking.

1) Exercise

2) Destroy all destructive patterns in your life... namely addictions, if there are any!

3) Find something you enjoy and socialize with other people who do that thing.

4) Don't look for love. You won't find it, atleast not in the way you want. (not saying you do) but sometimes people in your situation place all their expectations and hopes onto every person they encounter hoping it turns into love or friendship. Sometimes it doesn't end well. Love is best left to bloom on it's own

5) I don't believe in the concept of a soulmate. I believe that if you are compatible in several areas like religion, career, children, family, etc... that any two people can make a go of it. Socialize with people who have similiar ideals as you.

6) Learn to love yourself. Do things to lift your self esteem. Loving yourself is half the equation.

7) Do something to enhance your education or your career. Start school... finish school... try something different at work... those things engage you and IMHO only help in the long run.

[Braveheart1]

Great advice binurial. I agree, don't go looking for love, it will find you at the right time. Ask most couples how they met and most of them will tell you some story about grocery stores, superbowl party, at the airport while helping someone; some random places.

 

Just be yourself, be positive, help others, be courteous, do the right thing with people. Karma is a great friend to have on your side.