Need help just figuring it out

[star554]

My ex and I broke up about a month and a half ago. The reason was he admitted to me that after college starts for him (this January) he won't have time for me. Out of impulse, I broke up with him. That, and because that's what I thought he was getting at. We did LC after that and met up again 3 weeks after breaking up. In that instance, everything our relationship was lacking worked out. For me, a main issue was I hadn't met a single one of his friends and felt like he was ashamed or something. But he did introduce me and he was really nice to me -- like complimenting me in front of them, etc. Anyways, he has these patterns though where he just dissapears completely -- and I don't think he intends for me to get hurt. But he's made it obvious he wants to be with me but wants something light, and to not call me his girlfriend. On top of that, I keep feeling that if I don't start a conversation or make plans to see him, he won't attempt anything on his own. I had a normal conversation with him a few minutes ago, no fighting just talking about school, sports and stuff. But even though, we didn't talk about this, I keep feeling that there's something not right. Like the few minutes I get to talk to him or see him, I feel sooo happy and then he just disappears. And it's not because he doesn't like me, it's because he's just really busy and maybe just doesn't care enough. I'm sure he'll come around eventually when he finds time and starts to miss me but it seems that it'll always be temporary. And I'm just trying to figure out whether the waiting is worth whatever amount of time he does spend with me.

[SpottiOtti]

If he's made it obvious that he wants to be with you but something light, and not to call you his girlfriend? That means he wants to have you but without commitment. It means he doesn't want to be responsible for how he treats you or what he does on the side. He doesn't want to be held accountable for what he does. Even if he knows that you are holding out, waiting for more commitment, it will not stop him from doing what he wants.

 

Always believe what people tell you about themselves. They do it so when they hurt you, they can say, "well, I warned you . . . " and dance away guilt-free.

[star554]

Thanks... that's what my gut keeps telling me. It's just not worth it, is it?