acts12 Posted October 25, 2004 Share Posted October 25, 2004 Alright, here's my situation. There is this girl who I have a strong attraction for. We began talking about 2 1/2 months ago or so. Now, I am a very outgoing person. Most people would consider her as the outgoing type also. Before we really started 'talking', we were just kinda aware of each other but never really good friends, but knew of eachother. Me and My ex-girlfriend of 3 yrs had broken up 5 months previous to when me and her began talking. I am completely over my ex. Now here is my problem. I began catching on to some signals from this girl, got her number, started hanging out with her and some friends in groups, but nothing really alone. We finally went out alone a couple of times and things went really well. So well that I began liking this girl more and more with time. I could tell she was beginning to feel the same way. I was calling her on the phone and having short convos like everyday, every other day or so and things were going well. All of a sudden, she begins acting really really weird. So weird to the point where, before we would joke around and tease eachother, to her acting so nervous around me that she can hardly look me in the eyes. Here's an example. I had asked her earlier in the week once if she wanted to go get some icecream. She said she couldnt that night for some reason I cant remember. She had to study or something. Three days later me and her see eachother at this big group gathering thing and I ask her what she is doing afterwards and she says that she wasnt sure. I said me either. Then she says that she was thinking about maybe going to get some icecream. I think that you should know that she is by herself and didnt come with anyone else. I jumped all over the opportunity and asked if she wanted to go. She then got so nervous that she changed her mind within five minutes. Then changed it again to wanting to go. And then changed it again to not wanting to go. Anyways, so weird things like this have been happening for like the last month, so i stopped calling her as much. I havnt called her for 3 weeks on the phone now. Havent asked out when I see her out, and have really backed off alot. The last time I did call her (3 weeks ago), I left a message for her to call me back "if she wanted". She never called me back and I havent called her since. When I saw her in the big group setting (a group of like 750, we meet once a week), she came up to me and the first thing out of her mouth was "sorry I didnt call you back...yada yada". She said it so fast it almost seemed like she had it planned before she came up to me. I blew it off like it was nothing, but didnt ask her out and still havent called her. She skipped the gathering this past week and church (the two places i usually see her) for the first time in like 5 months this past week. My question is do you guys think this girl likes me or is playing hard to get. I hate playing games but with the way she started acting I felt like I didnt have a choice. Am I playing my cards right and want some advice on my next move. OH yeah, this girl has never dated before, so my other assumption is that this is all new and she doesnt know how to play the game, and is sending all these mixed signals without even knowing it. Should I continue to stay backed off or what. It has to be obvious to her that I backed off alot because I used call her on the phone and ask her to do something almost everytime I saw her. She would accept the opportunity like 50% of the time. I dont ask her out anymore either. OPINIONS WOULD BE GREATLY APPRECIATED. Quote Link to comment
goodquestion Posted October 25, 2004 Share Posted October 25, 2004 ok, dude ... you probably called her too much, and she could be confused about dating as you suggested. Never leave phone messages until you are "official" ... call her up, and ask her point blank, [her name] do you want to go get icecream (or whatever, but be specific) wednesday @ 7pm? ... if she gives you an excuse, forget her ... if she says she's busy, but doesn't suggest another day, forget her ... wait for her to answer. good luck bro. Quote Link to comment
JustBlazeBabe Posted October 25, 2004 Share Posted October 25, 2004 your being selfish, its prolly just a fling, dont wreck what you have and what he has over a petty little school girl crush. Quote Link to comment
acts12 Posted October 25, 2004 Author Share Posted October 25, 2004 your being selfish, its prolly just a fling, dont wreck what you have and what he has over a petty little school girl crush. Im confused. What do you mean? Quote Link to comment
Amore Posted October 25, 2004 Share Posted October 25, 2004 If she's never dated before, my guess is that she's afraid of a commitment or maybe just isn't ready for a relationship yet. If she isn't into the idea of dating and constantly makes excuses, it may be best to just let her go and not force the idea of "hooking up" on her. Quote Link to comment
acts12 Posted October 25, 2004 Author Share Posted October 25, 2004 By the way this girl 20 years old. And beautiful, so lots of guys try and talk to her. Quote Link to comment
Day_Walker Posted October 25, 2004 Share Posted October 25, 2004 Her actions seem to indicate that she isnt interested in you as probably anything more than a friend. If you still want to hang out with her then feel free to do so but dont get your hopes up. I would start to pursue other interests this girl isnt showing any signs of interest. I wouldnt call her or give her the indication that you are interested any more. Quote Link to comment
acts12 Posted October 25, 2004 Author Share Posted October 25, 2004 So you think she is un-interested? In the beginning (when I hardly knew the girl) she was asking to go to all my baseball games, started convos with me, and would always be constantly staring at me from different places throughout the places that we would be (when in groups). So you think her feelings changed? For some reason I think that she just got nervous and didnt know what to do. I just wanted to clarify this so i can get the best advice possible. Quote Link to comment
behind_these_eyes Posted October 25, 2004 Share Posted October 25, 2004 Watch Along Came Polly. I don't really know if/how it'll help, but this sounds a lot like that movie. Quote Link to comment
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