Should I believe in my ex's words?

[gillakin]

Hi all! I had a relationship with my former girlfrienf for about 2 years. Things seemed to go so well between us that -5 months after out first meeting- we got engaged and talked about moving together. We lived in different UE countries and couldn't move right away. There were pratical stuff (like finding a job) to be taken care of beforehand. I matured the thought of moving to her. When I was close to do it, she invited me to her country and ventilated that she loved me, but was not in love with me anymore and dumped me. When I heard that, I just took my things and walked away. There were no fights, no harsh words. Only tears and a broken heart. A few weeks after I came home, she told we were over and she had a new girlfriend. This happened 3 years ago. The other day, she sent me an email saying she would like to be, somehow, part of my life. I have been dwelling on ambivalent feelings and I don't know what to do. I still love her, but I lost the trust I had. She keeps saying that there was no on line up when she broke up with me. Should I believe that? Is it common for a lover to dump another lover and get engaged with someone else shortly after the dumping scene without having already someone else to go for? Thank you in advance for reading this and for the eventual replying

[antzca2000]

it happens, for someone to jump into a relationship right after a breakup.

 

And I dont think it really matters anymore wether or not the other girl was lined up before. It wont make a difference.

[Michael2]

No you shouldnt believe.

 

This type of people will use you to fill a void within them. She is most likely lonely, and wants to see if she can pull your strings.

[gillakin]

Thank you guys for replying and sharing your thoughts about this matter with me

 

To antzca2000:

It actually matters to know whether my ex had another woman lined up by the time she broke up with me. She still says there was no one then. She also says that she has changed ever since. It happens that I need a constistent ground if I am to develop and build up an eventual close relationship with her (whatever it might be)... and I don't see how lies/suspiciousness could make any good foundations...

 

To Michael2:

I have been dwelling on this dilemma for quite a while and I really don't know what to believe in. That is why I posted my thoughts... No one has ever come so close to the core of my heart as my ex did. Yet, I can't understand why she hadn't gradually shared with me the feelings that were leading to the dumping. I guess everything would be different by now. And, by the way, she doesn't sound lonely. She has a lover and she seems quite satisfied with her. For what purpose would "she want to see if she can pull my strings"??...