What's the best next step?

[Openwindow]

A quick background:

 

I am married and have 2 young boys (age 2 1/2 and 15 months) and another baby on the way, due in early December. My oldest son was diagnosed with Autism in August, and we have been having daily in home therapy for him and neurologist follow-ups every three months. His last follow up was not promising, the doctor felt his progress was slower than he hoped, and that his physical growth is seeming to take a down-turn (low muscle tone and lack of gross motor skills), and he wants him to see a neuro-muscular specialist and begin being tested for chromosome disorders in addition to his autism. He will also be starting a special pre-school when he turns 3 in October.

 

I am considering quitting my job to be with my children full time. I will be going on maternity leave at the end of November and am thinking of not returning. I work nights- 5pm-1am nightly and just have this feeling my boy (not to mention all my children) will do better if I was with them instead, especially with his transition to school. This is in addition to he fact I hate my current job- it is very stressful and unfulfilling.

 

I am afraid because though I know in my heart this it the right decision for my family on the one hand, I don't know that we can afford it. My paycheck is the higher of the 2 between my husband and I and we cannot survive on his alone. I would love to find a job that was less demanding and closer to home, or DH is willing to take a 2nd job to help pay bills.

 

I guess my question is - should I take this leap? I feel like the stars will never line up perfectly for it to be the right time, and I am a firm believer in "leap and the net will appear". With my special needs son starting school (if I work nights I will never see him) and the new baby on the way, I feel like if not now, when? However this is my children's future also, and I am terrified by the loss of income.

 

Any thoughts / advice / suggestions? Anything at all is appreciated!!!!!

[avman]

Sounds like you've already done some good thinking about this. You hate your current job, the hours are terrible, your children have special needs and require you to be home more. I think that's a pretty good case for not going back after your maternity leave!

 

I'd say once you are feeling up to it during your leave that you should start looking for a different part time job. Eventually you'll probably land something to fill in a bit of the income gap. You mentioned your spouse would take a second job if necessary to help out. So I think between the two of you there is a good plan in place.

[becomingkate]

My husband and I have experienced (too much) job loss in the last few years, but we make it work by changing our budget. Here's a few things we do:

-one year we had to sell our extra vehicle, our ping pong table, Xbox 360, roller blades, bicycles and laptop.

-we regularly shop second hand

-we have taken paper routes to make extra $$$

-I sold most of my gold and silver jewelry

-we started shopping wholesale grocery (large pieces of sirloin gets cut and frozen at home)

- we asked our parents for financial support (what they could spare)

- my oldest daughter moved back home and pays rent.

 

Good luck!