PLEASE HELP!!!

[hanginbyathread]

I feel that I have no one to turn to. I can't speak to any of my friends about this cuz they will all make me feel responsible for this, which I am.

I've been with my boyfriend for a couple of months and he is amazing. Unfortunately, I have been in some really bad relationships and due to this, have a tendency to push people away and act out. Well, it seems that I may have pushed away the best thing that has ever happened to me.

 

He says he hasn't lost hope but can't handle the emotional roller coaster. We're going to spend the day together tomorrow and I need to know what can I say and do to make this right. The thought of us not being together is making me sick to my stomach.

 

Any advice would be appreciated.

[Celadon]

Maybe the next time you feel like you should act out, you should take a quick break. If you start thinking things like, how he might hurt you or did he just insult you, take 10 deep breaths and clear your mind. How many times have you acted out, only to discover there was no problem at all?

 

Getting control of your emotions, instead of letting them control you, is really important.

 

Maybe tomorrow when you're together you should try as hard as you can to think about your bf and what you could do to make sure he's having a good time. If you think about him instead of yourself, you both might end up happier. Good luck on this!

[hanginbyathread]

Thanx so much for the reply. I will try to control my emotions tomorrow. If I don't make a serious change, I know that i will never be happy with anyone. I am actually going to ask my doc to refer me to a therapist.

[Trojanmn2]

what exactly do you mean by "act out"

[ShinyFairyLights]

Like K8tie Kool said, stay calm. I know from experience it's VERY EASY to freak out. I had episodes like that with my ex, because he'd plan something with me but break them to hang out with a friend he hadnt seen in a year. Normally, I would have been excited, but for some reason I had blown it out of porportion and starting freaking out and crying.

 

Things like that happen when you just automatically assume the worst. Don't assume anything. Just stay calm, and if you are like me and start to cry when you talk about your feelings, just take deep breaths.

 

Tell him your feelings, how you feel about him, or when he does things that make you mad or hurt you. Tell him that you want to work everything out, and you want to control yourself. You're just scared of being hurt, which is understandable. Let him know. More than likely, he'll tell YOU all the things he wanted to and you'll feel much better