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what do you do when your friend is a flirt?


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One of my really good friends has started to show her true colors lately. She's very outgoing, to the point of being aggressive, and has a lot of insecurities and feels the need to have attention on her at all times (this I know by her own admission). Her friends from freshman year of college dropped her because she couldn't get her flirting under control...i.e. flirting with guys they brought around. At first I thought that maybe they were judgmental and so I wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt, but now I see what they must have seen.


She's extremely clingy. I feel like she doesn't want me to have any interests outside of her, and if she doesn't have a boyfriend then she doesn't want anyone else in our group to either, making judgmental comments about any guy we're interested in or are in a relationship with. We usually try to ignore it--but now it's evolved to her flirting with any guy around her, including the guys we like. I feel like I can't trust her. I've confronted her twice about her behavior, and she seemed remorseful and apologized, but at this point I think it's just part of her personality.


Last night, she told a guy I just started talking to that she was going to wear lingerie to a party tomorrow night. Someone who calls themselves my "best friend" shouldn't cross that line, especially when I've already called her out on it. I don't know what to do. I've already given her chances and she says she's trying, but actions speak louder than words.

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Yeah I don't think she values your friendship that much, or she wouldn't hit on the guys you like.


Make it clear, that if she wants to keep her friendship with you, to stop doing that - even tho this will be the second time you have to tell her this.


But I get the feeling that she has no boundaries and couldn't give a toss if she hurts people along the way, just for the attention.

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If one of my buddies hit on a girl I was interested in and he knew about it there would be major problems. Between guy friends there is a "I saw her first" rule with girls. At least between my friends there is. Obviously is she expresses sincere interest in someone else we know when to back off as well.

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I knew a girl who would always flirt with any guy in our age group around. Even friends' boyfriends. Even if she wasn't actually interested in them, she just craved male attention and felt superior to all her friends, like she could have their boyfriends if she wanted. Once when I was with my boyfriend I saw here in the street so I literally ran away with him before she could see us so she wouldn't get the chance to hit on him. Not because I felt he'd reciprocate, but because it'd make me angry if she did it in the first place.


Friends who knowingly flirt with the guys you are with/guys you like are not worth having around.

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