RastaPasta Posted December 8, 2011 Share Posted December 8, 2011 Well my story is in my signature. I saw my ex last weekend with his new gf. I knew I was going to run into him but it was still awkward for me. I caught him looking at me once and I guess it made me sad because only a few short months ago we were inseparable and now we don't talk. He is still pretty bitter and angry about the breakup, I'm not sure why since he was the one who ended it. He just seems angry with me for some reason and oddly very informed about my life, even though we have been NC and he is blocked from my FB profile. It's not that we had this really great relationship or anything, but there are days like this when I still miss him and want him back. Our mutual friends seem to have hope for us, but for me I don't know if he'll ever change or if I can forgive how he has been acting these pass few months. I still care a great deal about him. But now that he has a new gf I wonder if something is wrong with me. In one breath he tells me I'm not enough for him and in the next he tells me that I gave him more love than anyone he has ever been with. The last text message he sent me said that our break-up hurt him more than he showed and he hoped we could be friends. But at the same time he's making fun of me behind my back and analyzing everything I do. I hate feeling like this, I would just wish I didn't miss him or even still love him. I want this to be over. Link to comment
woodsrose10 Posted December 8, 2011 Share Posted December 8, 2011 In one breath he tells me I'm not enough for him and in the next he tells me that I gave him more love than anyone he has ever been with. The last text message he sent me said that our break-up hurt him more than he showed and he hoped we could be friends. Did he say/do all of this recently, since he's been with his new gf? Link to comment
woodsrose10 Posted December 8, 2011 Share Posted December 8, 2011 It sounds like a part of him does want you back. But then he remembers he's with a new gf & that he broke up with you. (Why?) I'm no therapist, so don't take my opinion too seriously. But I think maybe you should flat-out ask him if he wants you back. And/or at least ask him why he's acting the way he is. To say one thing & then the other in the same breath isn't typical behavior for an ex to act. Link to comment
RastaPasta Posted December 8, 2011 Author Share Posted December 8, 2011 It was about 2mths ago, after he sent that I just replied with 'ok' and I never spoke to him after that. He was with his new gf at the time though. I honestly am afraid to ask, from what I have heard from our mutual friends he is still bitter and angry about the break-up and he is still continues to talk about me. Link to comment
RastaPasta Posted December 8, 2011 Author Share Posted December 8, 2011 When I asked why he was acting the way he was, he said because every time he sees me pull away from him it hurts. (he said this while he had a gf) Link to comment
GreenCupcake Posted December 8, 2011 Share Posted December 8, 2011 It was about 2mths ago, after he sent that I just replied with 'ok' and I never spoke to him after that. He was with his new gf at the time though. I honestly am afraid to ask, from what I have heard from our mutual friends he is still bitter and angry about the break-up and he is still continues to talk about me. If that's the case then he obviously isn't over the break-up yet. It sounds like he still had feelings for you when you two broke up and that's why his thoughts are all over the place. It's possible that in one moment he remembers how he cared for you and all the great times you two shared, and in another moment he becomes angry because of the break-up so he tries to find reasons to justify his decision. He obviously feels conflicted. And it's only natural that you would miss him. Just continue to give yourself time though. It will get better. Sometimes it'll turn into a bumpy roller coaster ride but it'll smooth out. Link to comment
italiannmf24 Posted December 8, 2011 Share Posted December 8, 2011 He does not decide your worth, you do. Allow yourself time and No Contact, start working on yourself and figuring out problems that stem from within - this pain is only temporary, trust me. Link to comment
utopie Posted December 8, 2011 Share Posted December 8, 2011 It looks like your ex has issues on his own and needs to work on them before getting in a relationship with anybody really. If you were to get back together it would not be healthy for either of you. Keep on living your life. You cannot control your feelings and it will take time for you to truly accept it and get over him but you will. If he realizes after dating around that you are indeed the right one for him he will reach out to you and be clear about it. The thing is you might no be there for him and well, too bad for him Link to comment
RastaPasta Posted December 8, 2011 Author Share Posted December 8, 2011 this pain is only temporary, trust me. It seems like it's taking forever. Link to comment
jonesyjakk Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 It does fade.......and then one day.....it's gone! It's like you've been walking around with curtains over your eyes, the pain is caused because you keep walking into things....slowly the curtains open and you are able to avoid certain things to stop you from hurting yourself....suddenly you see everything....and can't be hurt anymore.....the you laugh because you see a little handle by your eyes...and you realise if only you knew that handle was there, you could have pulled it and opened the curtains a long time ago..... Jonesy Link to comment
AlmostPeace Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 It does fade.......and then one day.....it's gone! It's like you've been walking around with curtains over your eyes, the pain is caused because you keep walking into things....slowly the curtains open and you are able to avoid certain things to stop you from hurting yourself....suddenly you see everything....and can't be hurt anymore.....the you laugh because you see a little handle by your eyes...and you realise if only you knew that handle was there, you could have pulled it and opened the curtains a long time ago..... Jonesy This is so true I seem to have forgotten it from my previous serious break up from years and years ago, but it is spot on. Link to comment
dobbin Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 hang in there. i miss my ex too. the march will end if we soldier on. keep your head up. stay strong. time heals all pain. Link to comment
The Man Who Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 It seems like it's taking forever. Define forever in the grand scheme of a lifetime! The more pressure you put on yourself like what you've said above, the longer it'll take for you to actually get over it. As a few people have said it is temporary, you will get over it but you can't rush it. You just have to ride the storm and come out of it with your head held high and a big smile no your face Rasta Link to comment
RastaPasta Posted December 9, 2011 Author Share Posted December 9, 2011 Define forever in the grand scheme of a lifetime! The more pressure you put on yourself like what you've said above, the longer it'll take for you to actually get over it. As a few people have said it is temporary, you will get over it but you can't rush it. You just have to ride the storm and come out of it with your head held high and a big smile no your face Rasta Maybe I am putting too much pressure on myself. Link to comment
The Man Who Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 Maybe I am putting too much pressure on myself. Only you can really answer that one but there's no short term/long term way of getting over an ex. It just happens naturally, the more we try to speed up the process, more often than not the more it fails. Hope that makes sense Link to comment
RastaPasta Posted December 9, 2011 Author Share Posted December 9, 2011 I just want the mourning to be over with. I get so anxious every time I think I might run into him because we run in the same circles. Then I think it goes well, until someone tells me some silly story like he's telling people I tried to talk to his gf when I saw her and questioning my best friend asking her why I would block his gf. Then I get angry and then sad. Link to comment
jonesyjakk Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 It's a ride.....it's a bombardment of emotions......august wasn't that long ago...it's all still fresh.....it does fade....you will get there...but it doesn't happen over night Link to comment
RastaPasta Posted December 9, 2011 Author Share Posted December 9, 2011 thanks Jonesy Link to comment
TessaB Posted December 9, 2011 Share Posted December 9, 2011 It seems like it's taking forever. I feel ya! And, I get so annoyed at myself for still feeling this way. For me its been about 2 months, following a two year relationship. I get so mad at myself. I have 'better' days and then the next day I'm doing work and all of a sudden breaking down and crying out of nowhere. I just have to believe this is only temporary... Link to comment
jonesyjakk Posted December 10, 2011 Share Posted December 10, 2011 I am a year out of an 8 n half year r/s, I promise you, as long as you want to get over them, it does get better with time. Link to comment
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