Probably reading too much into things, but I'm going to ask anyway! :)

[ashley2323]

Just when I thought I was done with the forum, I'm back again, holding onto whatever sliver of hope I can...

 

Long story short: I was with my ex for a little over a year. He was unhappy, he treated me poorly, and I can see this very clearly now. He dumped me at the end of December last year, only to come crying back at the end of March (literally crying), saying he'd made a huge mistake. I gave him a second chance, only to have him tell my good friend at the end of May that he just wanted to be friends with me.

 

I then tried to be friends with him; he then accused me two weeks in of telling people we were "still working on it." (I had done no such thing). Outraged by this, I decided to stop contact, and let him contact me when he wanted to. He never did. We then had a couple of awkward run ins in which he ignored me completely.

 

On the final of these awkward run ins, I sent him a text that (dramatically -- we were tailgating) asked "What did I ever do to you?" I got no response. I responded, "Nothing, exactly as I'd thought." He then went off and asked why I cared, if the situation had been reversed I'd have just talked badly about him, etc. I responded with a text that really encompassed everything I'd been wanting to say to him. I'd never expressed anger towards him -- just hurt -- and I saw this as my chance. I told him he was cruel, he was selfish, he treated me poorly, and that he should really think hard about the way he treats people, etc. I did not expect a response.

 

I then received a massive text, in which he admitted he was wrong to treat me the way he did, that he never meant to hurt me, that he truly apologized for everything. He then said he "wished things were different." (I, of course, tried not to read into this). We ended the conversation on good terms -- I told him to say hello the next time we ran into each other.

 

So then, a week or so later, he texts me to tell me that he ran into my sister at a bar, was surprised she was nice to him, wished me a happy halloween, and said he hoped I was safe. (?). He then messaged my sister to tell her it was really good to see her. Then he texted me later in the week to rehash an inside joke. The following week, he texted me to talk about a new album he really liked.

 

Then we ran into each other. He was with a friend of his that I never thought liked me, and I was with a friend who he knows does not like him. We said hello, then sat around awkwardly at different tables, but it was okay. Later that night, he texts me again to say that he ran into my sister and asked me to make sure she got home safely. I was asleep, so I didn't get it until the morning, but he said he saw her out and was concerned about her. We had a little conversation, and said thanks for looking out for her.

 

Is there anything I should be reading into here? Or is it likely that he's just trying to be friends as he wanted to be back in the summer? I don't get why he'd ostensibly cut off all communication in the summer, but now seems overly friendly...

 

I guess at this point I am trying to maintain 0 expectations (but of course, I'm posting in the getting back together forum, so maybe it's not working out so well...). I'm not initiating any contact with him, and he remains off of my FB friends list. But I am wondering what's going through his mind. Any insight appreciated.

[camus154]

Standard advice: you're worried too much about what's going on in his mind and not enough about what's going on in yours.

 

He treated you poorly, you broke up, you gave him a second chance, he burned you again. Now everyone is running into everyone else and you're confused and wondering what it all means.

 

Absolutely nothing. I would strongly advise that you continue on with your life....without him in it.

[butterflyburn]

That guy is a jerk. U should be pleased u got away. If I went u, I would have moved on ages ago. He does not deserve u let alone a post about him from you today.

 

Hold your head high and let the bugger go.

 

From what I see, u are in grave danger of being the fall back girl. Do u have any standards? if u do, now is the time to instate them bse that u are even confused about this jerk is not a good thing

[DylanNotorious]

He's an idiot who can't communicate with you in any shape or form. People who can't communicate and only send texts of jokes and silly things like that, isn't even worth your time. He has treated you poorly and the only reason that you got any proper response from him was when you went to town on his ass! It never came from him out of a place of sincerity. Please forget about him you can do so much better.

[mhowe]

Standard advice: you're worried too much about what's going on in his mind and not enough about what's going on in yours.

 

He treated you poorly, you broke up, you gave him a second chance, he burned you again. Now everyone is running into everyone else and you're confused and wondering what it all means.

 

Absolutely nothing. I would strongly advise that you continue on with your life....without him in it.

 

Totally agree. He isn't a jerk or an idiot, but he is immature. All of this means nothing, and he should be thought of as part of your past.

[playstheblues]

I can understand why you are confused especially with the jokes and chatty banter etc. I guess it really depends- you should ask yourself- do you really think you want to get back together with him and if you do are you happy to be treated the way he treated you before? If the answer is yes, than I suppose you could just see where the whole thing goes. I'm afraid that he is just leading you up the garden path though. What does your instinct say?