what can i do to save my relationship? is it savable at all?

[JackieR]

a year and a half ago i met a man who i fell for. i thought he was so attractive and smart and funny and he had a good head on his shoulders but he was in a relationship at the time so i didn't pre sue him. but about 10 months ago he broke up with his girlfriend and a month later we started dating. i couldnt believe i was with this man, someone who i said i would go threw anything for. for the first 7 months i was incredible happy the whole world seemed brighter when we were together. three months into our relationship we started to spend every night together up until about two months ago. when i started to feel different. i started to question our relationship and weather or not i loved him. i had this fear in the back of my head the whole time from the beginning that it would end like my last relationship did (with me falling out of love and feeling depressed) and it appears that that is exactly what happened. for the past month and a half we have been trying to keep our love alive. I have hid nothing from him telling him exactly how i feel in everyway. this past weekend i realized that my feelings are completely gone. that i didnt love him i didnt want him to touch me and the thought of touching him made me sick. i told him this. i cant stop crying. i cry every minute of everyday. i want to love him so much! i want him so much! he has every quality i want in someone. why isnt that enough? ive told him everything but he still thinks there is hope. he says that he loves me and that he will do anything to have me. right now i feel like its hopeless but when he talks to me about it it gives me a little bit of hope inside. every time i see him i get sick and sometimes even have panic attacks. i just want to scream and run away from all this. why cant i love him when i want to? what can we do? can i get my feelings back? im so desperate please please please help me!!! i dont know what caused this. nothing in our relationship has changed. i just want him to be mine.

[offplanet]

I've experienced this myself, and I don't know what it means or how to fix it. I think it's some kind of phobia. You mentioned panic attacks, so that confirms me in thinking it's to do with anxiety or phobia. Maybe counselling would help. I know how distressing this must be. Thankfully he is understanding. I hope you can get some help. All the best.